The BAU Family One Shots- Season 13
by Kirabaros
Summary: Following season thirteen, various one shot tags of the BAU Family. Featuring snippets with the BAU as well as introduced characters from the Heart-Blood Cement universe as they affect Spencer Reid.
1. 13-01 Brotherly Love Has Wings

**Brotherly Love Has Wings**

 _A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity._ \- King Solomon

 _It was a failsafe but the biggest one was bringing in someone who is good at keeping secrets._

Michael Nassar was all about keeping secrets. It was part of his job as a Special Forces operator for the army under DIA and carried over when he had been uniquely recruited to join the IRT unit for the FBI where he kept an eye on the situation regarding Scratch for two years, helping when he could and being the operator from the shadows that Emily and Steven needed. He did what he could in between trying to save the IRT from being gutted by politics. Most would consider him a hero. He didn't consider himself that since that was not what was needed at the moment.

Michael hadn't batted an eye when his best friend and little brother Spencer Reid basically shoved Penelope Garcia and his newest friend from IRT, Matt Simmons out the door. Michael didn't leave and knew that Reid wouldn't notice unless he wanted to. And even if he did, there was no way that he was going anywhere and leaving Reid alone. He leaned against the wall after giving Simmons a signal that it was okay and let Reid do his work.

"I need to work, Mike," Reid's voice entered softly.

Michael looked at Reid and replied, "Then work. I'm your dogsbody right now." He looked at his friend with a gentle but firm look. It told Reid that he wasn't leaving.

Reid looked at Michael for a moment and then went back to work trying to find out what BICAP meant. He started going through all the books and the possible acronyms that it could be. He didn't have it in him to fight his older brother and the most important thing was to find Emily. Scratch had her and the clock was running to get her back. There was no time for arguments and it wasn't like either of them would win. That was a stalemate waiting to happen.

Michael kept his thoughts to himself as he watched Reid work. He had noticed the same as Alvarez the symptoms. He knew them all too well. He was grateful that Alvarez said what he said to his little brother. The subject wasn't closed but just postponed and at the moment he was there just in case and he knew Reid well. So, he leaned against the far wall with his arms crossed over his chest. From his vantage point, he could see Simmons and Garcia in the bullpen below. Old habits died hard and the tactical maneuvers just kept coming.

Reid went through his books and files trying to find what he needed. He felt his frustration mount. He knew he needed to find the answer. Emily needed his help. She needed his head in the game to finish this. He knew that he told Simmons and Garcia to leave and while he wanted Michael to go, he was glad that his practically big brother decided to not listen to his request. Then again, he never listened when it was serious and he made it known when everyone accused Michael of being the unsub.

Michael had always been there even when he was deployed. It was a special bond between Reid and the genius from Texas. It was a bond that had been cemented from shared experiences that included the good, the bad and the ugly. If Michael was on deployment, Sophia was there and Reid owed her a lot for what she did when he needed it. The point was they accepted him with no questions asked and never once did they get that awkward look when he rambled or missed a social cue. They were like brothers and Michael made that clear and Reid accepted it fully and in agreement. It was one of those foundations he needed at a time like this, but it wasn't enough.

Reid was becoming frustrated. He had once told Hotchner that he worked best under pressure and he showed that when he worked to find Michael when he was kidnapped and held by the unub in Texas. Now it felt like his brain wasn't working like it should. His wife Genevieve called it firing on all four cylinders, using the car metaphor and he wasn't firing all four of them. It was making him upset and feverish. He prayed that he would find the answer soon otherwise he was going to lose it.

He did find the answer but it took him thirty minutes. Thirty minutes when it should have taken him at least thirty seconds. And it didn't help that his vision was blurry and he was discombobulated. He pressed his palm to his eye since it felt like a migraine but it wasn't. And he started hearing voices and he recognized them. Feeling frustrated, he grabbed a book and threw it where it struck the glass with a hard thud and fell to the ground. He picked up another book with the intention to throw it but it was grabbed from his hand.

Reid had never been a physical fighter but he had been taught how to defend himself. He had several sources that showed him; they showed him that he didn't need a gun to defend himself. But he felt like swinging a punch and he swung it at the one person that cared most about him next to his parents. He swung straight for Michael's face. It was blocked and he tried again, clipping the jaw. He was just angry and frustrated and the pain from his vision was too much. He would have kept on going if he hadn't been grabbed and pushed into the wall away from the window. He blinked and found himself staring at his best friend, who was looking at him with a pensive and firm look.

Reid reacted more from his past experience and demanded, "Let me go."

"No."

"Let me go!"

"Spence," Michael called out in a firm tone. "Stop. Calm down."

Reid struggled and protested, "I can't because what should have taken me thirty seconds took me thirty minutes." He tried to push Michael away.

Michael refused to be moved. He knew that Garcia and Simmons saw Reid throwing the book and would come to see what was wrong. He trusted Simmons though to hold back and give him a few minutes after the last two years working together and getting to know each other's tendencies. He stared at Reid and saw the anguish in his eyes. It pained him to see his little brother like this but he had to be firm. He spoke in the crooning tone that he used to soothe his daughter to sleep, "And it's okay, Spence."

"No, it's not, Mike," Reid protested. He still pressed against Michael's hold. "It's on me if we can't get to Emily on time."

Michael knew the stakes. He had been in these situations all the time and it could be draining especially when someone's life was in your hands. He knew that the urge to hurry was there but he also learned a few things and imparted them to Reid, "And worry leads to haste and haste leads you to the grave. That's why I'm telling you to calm down, little brother."

"Come on. This isn't one of your nuggets of wisdom, Mike." Reid scowled at the man that wasn't letting him go. "This is Emily's life..."

"You don't think I know that?" Michael raised his voice a little to reestablish his dominance. "I know what is at stake. Why do you think Ems asked for my help? Why do you think that I'm here? Scratch has done you all wrong and nothing makes me angrier than the fact that he had started stalking Jack. You know me, Spence. You know what I do."

"This isn't a mission, Mike."

"It is and it isn't." Michael sobered and swallowed slightly. "That is why I'm here and not out there with Simmons and Penny." He relaxed his hold a little but he still had control in case Reid decided to try something. "I am here to keep it that way. Emotions can get in the way and I know you're frustrated because of what you've been through."

Reid narrowed his eyes. "You don't know anything, Mike." He pushed on Michael and managed to push him back to get some space but his back was still against the wall. "You don't know what I'm going through. You don't know how..."

"Angry?" Michael took a step forward with a raised brow. He kept his voice low in that soothing tone. "Discombobulation? Oh I know that well. I was a prisoner too." He paused, certain that he had Reid's attention. He continued, "Kandahar was over eight years ago and since then I've been subject to more of the same including being beaten by a group of soldiers that blamed me for that. Ruptured my spleen and gave me a renal tear. Through all that... I still see it. I see Sarai's face, terrified before that... bastard raped her. I hear the whimpers and screams of the girls crying from being beaten, burned by cigarettes and some being violated... I still see it."

Reid looked at his friend, his brother. In his anger, he had forgotten that. He apologized, "I'm sorry."

Michael shook his head slightly, "This won't go away, Spence. I will tell you now that it may get worse before it gets better but you need to work through it."

"And how has that worked for you?"

Michael blinked at the sudden snarkiness from Reid. He knew that feeling too. It was not easy to talk about trauma. To this day, he and Sarai still didn't talk about it much but they did what they could to work through it. He stared at Reid and replied, "Quite well and you know why? It's because of you, Sarai, Rory, the team... all of it; people that care about me are there if and when I need it. That and because I believe that God gave me the burden for a reason."

"God?"

"Don't go there Spence," Michael warned, "We both agreed to respect that. But to answer, yes. He never gives us more than we can bear and He gives us the signs, the light. I know for you it is Gen."

"Don't bring her into this," Reid warned as he turned away. Michael had backed away enough to let him move but he was ready to jump him again if he wanted and it got out of hand.

"I will Spence," Michael countered as he tracked Reid. "She is affected as much as you. We all are." He pursed his lips and added, "Gen tries to be strong but even I know there is only so much that woman can handle and she fought tooth and nail for you. I was ready to go full on lawyer mode and then some and once even dared to think of jailbreak. And it pained me that she was suffering and I couldn't fix it because you were in prison and I pained me I couldn't do anything about it."

Reid turned to look at Michael. He absorbed the words that his brother had told him. "I know," he whispered. "I know it pained her. I saw it."

"No one likes seeing the person they love in a situation like that." Michael looked at Reid with a knowing look. "Now Simmons and Penny are going to come into this room. Can you keep it together enough to give them what they need?"

Reid looked at the ground at nothing in particular. He could do that but he wanted to do worse. He wanted to kill Scratch for what he had done. He nodded, "I got it, Mike. I know the answer."

"Good." Michael turned to go open the door.

"I want to kill him, Mike. For everything he has done."

Michael turned to look at Reid. "I know, Spence. I want to do the same. The bastard hurt my family."

Reid paused at that. Michael had always called him his little brother. Partially as a joke and partially because that was how he saw him. Reid never questioned that. It was that he sensed Michael meant that in a different context. He knew that Genevieve called the team the BAU family and thinking about it... that's what it was. They were family. Michael was merely stating that those that meant the most to him had been hurt. He had seen how tense he was when he found out about what happened to Walker. He nodded, "I just..."

Michael walked towards Reid and put a hand on his shoulder, "We'll work it out, Spence. Right now, trust me as you away have. Stay with me and we'll get Ems back. Stay with me. Kick the tires and light the fires." He then said a phrase in Arabic that he knew Reid would understand.

Reid heard it and looked at his brother. He nodded. He was still angry and frustrated but he was calmer now. What Alvarez said made sense now. He could do this. First step was to get Emily back and if they could get Scratch in the process then that was fine with him. He still wanted to kill him though. He knew that he wouldn't be able to hold back from going if and when they found him but he would do his job. He had his best friend, his brother, flying in and giving just what was needed. He could do this.

 _The heart is like a cup. The more you fill it with love of Allah the less room there is for love of Dunya._ \- the Koran

* * *

 **A/N:** Michael knows what Reid is going through and is there to be a bit of calm in the storm. Tag to 13.01 Wheels Up. Enjoy.


	2. 13-02 A Better Change, New Acceptance

**A Better Change, New Acceptance**

 _The two most powerful warriors are patience and time._ – Leo Tolstoy

Patience was considered a virtue. It was a virtue and could be a strength. It certainly was once one of Spencer Reid's qualities. He had proven he had patience in a lot of things. He certainly proved it when he pursued the woman that became his wife and he definitely had it when he learned to live with his roommate who became his best friend and practically older brother. This time though, he wasn't certain he had it.

The team had been placed on a six week leave after Scratch had set a trap for the team and kidnapped Emily and drugged her. During that time he had been working on getting reinstated. He did the mandatory psych evals and his gun qualification. He did everything, including spoiling his wife by waiting on her hand and foot much to her amusement, and was reinstated. But there was a stipulation to that reinstatement and it was non-negotiable.

Initially, it felt like an insult to his abilities. He felt a pang of anger at first but some of his favorite tea and a few words from his best friend and a phone call from his wife and he saw the reasoning… sort of. It allowed him to get back to work and the high note was that in addition to Matt Simmons joining the team, Michael was on the team as well. Per Emily's request, DIA decided on some sort of liaison position with the stipulation that he could be pulled as needed to meet with his ODA team. It was weird so Reid didn't question it and Michael was disinclined to talk about it and no one questioned it. In any case, Reid felt… he wanted to say he felt safe with his big brother more in his life. But he was still uncertain.

Luckily, there was a case to keep his mind mostly occupied in Naples, Florida. The unsub was killing women and packing them in vintage suitcases. He was assigned with Emily and Michael to set up shop at the local precinct. He was going over the casefile with his mind mostly on the case but his thoughts were going back to the stipulation that he had to agree to. He managed to reply to Emily's query about whether or not he was okay. He gave an assuring murmur and went back to writing until he glanced over to see Michael sorting paperwork like he was engrossed with it but he knew better. Reid felt he had to get it out since he learned the hard way about bottling things in, "No. Actually, no."

Emily turned and cast a quick glance at Michael. He gave her a look and a slight nod before going back to work after pulling out a set of noise cancelling headphones. She knew about them but it still surprised her that he just did that. She turned her focus to Reid and asked, "What's going on?"

Reid sat back in his chair. He noticed Michael was wearing his noise cancelling headphones. He wanted to smile since he knew the reason behind them but he also wanted to hug him. He knew Michael was tuning out them as a courtesy. It allowed him to focus on Emily and he said, "There was a condition to my reinstatement. For every hundred days that I spend in the field, I'm required to take thirty days off."

Emily nodded, "I know. They told me."

"So it's not even a full reinstatement," Reid protested.

Emily saw where this was going. She glanced over at Michael and saw that he wasn't even paying attention. She was willing to bet though that he would know everything about this conversation eventually. She never figured out how he did that. Sitting down for a heart to heart with Reid, she replied, "Of course it is. The thirty day clause is just a temporary safety valve. We all need one now and then. Hell, I just finished watching 119 episodes of _The Amazing Race_ for that reason."

Reid felt a little foolish but he still wasn't completely convinced. True he had a pep talk with Michael after his gun qualification but… He had learned that the mind could always bring back doubts. Michael said it wasn't necessarily a bad thing but that when you start to have doubts, it's a sign to reevaluate how you go about making your decisions and that each experience taught you something about yourself.

Emily saw the look on Reid's face and continued, "Besides, it's not like you'll be put in mothballs for those thirty days. I've arranged for you to teach a series of seminars to other agents."

Reid frowned slightly as he asked, "Seminars about what?"

"That's up to you," Emily replied with a slight gesture. "The world according to Spencer Reid," she added with a hint of pride in her voice. "Besides, I'm sure it will help with Gen. How is she by the way?"

Reid blinked at the question. He had gotten better at not stiffening at the mention of his wife. That was the worst tell he had and it had been a source of jokes with the team when Morgan had been there. He thought about it and concluded that his thirty day cooling off period would be a good thing in the coming months. He was doing what he could to keep Genevieve from getting overexcited about everything and preparations. He allowed a small smile, "She's doing fine. Mostly tired but… active and happy."

"And you?"

Reid made a slight sound, "I think I understand what Mike meant when he told me when Sarai was pregnant with Rory." He cleared his throat slightly, "I'm content." He frowned slightly since he wasn't sure about the word being the right one.

Emily understood and gave a reassuring hand squeeze. "It makes me excited that there will be a mini Reid." She smiled at him.

"Gen is convinced that the baby will be like me even though there is no conclusive evidence intelligence is inherited," Reid replied, "And she doesn't want to know if it's a boy or a girl until it's born. It's one surprise I actually like."

"I'll bet."

Reid smiled along with Emily. He truly was happy that his wife was pregnant and it looked like she was going to carry to term. It was like that relief after all the pain. He sobered and asked, "Are you worried?"

"About what?"

"About me being in the field. That I might freak out, overreact?" Reid turned a piercing gaze at Emily. He knew people were glad he was reinstated but being a profiler… he had to know what people really thought.

"Why would you even…"

"Because I wanted to kill Scratch," Reid interrupted. He had to lay it out to Emily. He had once before to Michael and somewhat to Genevieve so it was easier.

Emily understood and nodded slightly, "Standing room only on that bus."

"No, I mean it literally." Reid looked at Emily and was prepared for the ax to fall. He leaned forward and explained himself, "After what he did to you, if I had found him, I would have killed him. And… I would have slept well."

Emily processed Reid's confession. She knew that he was risking quite a bit with that confession since it could easily be taken the wrong way. She understood his feelings though. The BAU was a family to him and in his mind he was seeing someone who had hurt a member of that family. It was no different than what she had witnessed with Michael's reaction to Reid being arrested and the very likely possibility of his not being extradited. Even though Michael reacted that way, he still kept his head in the game because he knew he was needed and he came through on more than one occasion. It was why she requested some position be found for him to have a legitimate reason to be with the BAU.

Looking at Reid, Emily decided to tell him. She said, "The review board asked me to weigh in before they made their decision and… given Mike's unique talents, they asked for a tactical appraisal. I told them you were rock solid. Mike… impressed them."

Reid didn't doubt that and he knew what that would entail. He never doubted that if given the opportunity, Michael would come through for him, do anything to help him out. Emily though… He looked at her and said softly, "Thank you for putting yourself on a limb for me."

"I know you, Spencer," Emily replied, taking in the somber look. "The limb isn't going to break."

Reid gave his thanks through the look he gave her. He let her go since they did have a case to work on. He sat in his seat and put a hand to his head and gave a slight massage. It said a lot that Emily believed in him, that he wouldn't break.

"She is right, Spence."

Reid looked up to see Michael. He had been sitting back and leaning in his chair. The headphones were hanging around his neck. "How long have you been listening?"

"Didn't need to listen. You know that," Michael replied with a wry smile. He straightened up and leaned forward to look at Reid.

Reid did know that. He knew that Michael could explain that it was all body language but most wouldn't believe it. It was now a preference to have some mysteriousness like Reid's secrets of physics magic. His lip twitched and he looked downward at his paper work. His hands were clasped in front of him.

Michael studied him for a moment before saying, "I don't say things just to throw out a meaningless platitude. I mean what I say. You are rock solid as Ems says. We know you, little brother." He got up to go work on the board, pausing to give Reid a gentle pat to the shoulder.

Normally averse to touching, Reid welcomed the pat. He turned to watch his brother pin up and start making connections to the case at hand. His lip twitched as he watched Michael put the noise cancellation headphones back on and continued to work. He turned and looked at his own work, took a breath and picked up his pencil.

It meant a lot that Emily had that much faith in him. It eased the burden a little. It was a work in progress adjusting to be in the real world again. Reid knew that he had friends and family there ready to support and give help. But he knew he was going to have to figure out a few things on his own. He was willing to do that since he had noticed a few things since his incarceration. They weren't necessarily a bad thing. Maybe it was a change for the better.

 _The first step towards change is awareness. The second step is acceptance._ – Nathaniel Branden

* * *

 **A/N:** Reid's thoughts and heart to heart with Emily about his reinstatement. Tag to "To a Better Place." Enjoy.


	3. 13-02 Friendship's Place

**Friendship's Place**

 _There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship._ – Thomas Aquinas

"Unca Spence!"

Spencer Reid was pulled out of his thoughts when he heard his name and turned to see a whirlwind of ribbons and soft brown curls come running towards him. He smiled big and kneeled just in time to be grabbed around the neck and nearly tackled by the whirlwind. Wrapping his arms around the little girl, he stood up and hugged her. "Hey Rory."

"Ima said you and Auntie Gen were coming n JJ, Emmie…"

Reid smiled at the little girl as she pronounced all the members of the team as best as she could and feeling proud about it. He had been convinced that his practically older brother's daughter, Aurora, was going to be a smart one. Brilliant, even though he knew that intelligence wasn't conclusive to be inherited. He looked at the little girl and replied, "Yeah. Your dad invited us over to dinner."

"Uh huh. Henry and Mike are here n the Simmonses."

Reid wanted to laugh at the way the little girl lumped Simmons' kids all together. It had been sort of spontaneous and sort of not that Michael invited the whole team and their families to his house for a family dinner. The way he announced it left no room for doubt that everyone was coming or Michael would be forced to bring them in since no one was brave enough to say no to Sarai. Except for maybe Michael but then again he was the craziest of the team.

Reid walked around holding Aurora until she asked to be put down. She ended up tugging him by the hand saying, "Come on Unca Spence. Show you sumthin."

Reid looked at Genevieve who was chatting with JJ and Will. Rossi was commandeered into the kitchen by Sarai and the other team members were chatting. They weren't going to miss him for long so he indulged. He ended up being joined by Henry and allowed both of them to drag him into the courtyard garden in the back of the house. They were greeted by excited barks.

Reid hesitated at the adult German Shepherd that trotted up to both kids and started licking and soliciting for pats. He wasn't afraid of dogs but he just wasn't really a dog person. He liked his cats. Actually, they grew on him and he found that he liked their personalities. The dog looked up at him, panting and then sat down as if to encourage that it wasn't a threat.

"This is Zeke," Aurora beamed happily as she hugged the dog. She beckoned Henry over to pet him and he obliged. She looked at Reid with a curious expression, "You wanna pet him?"

Reid didn't really want to but he didn't want to disappoint Aurora either. He reached out and held his hand towards the dog and was rewarded with a paw shake. It was over quickly as Aurora took off with Henry and calling out to Zeke to play. Reid called out, "Rory, I don't think…"

"It's okay, Spence."

Reid turned to see that he was joined by Michael. The man was looking very much like a college professor with the blazer covering the form fitting shirt he was wearing. "I don't want to get in trouble with Sarai."

Michael gave a slight smile, "It won't matter. Rory loves Zeke and that dog will follow her everywhere." He saw Reid's look and added, "He's good with kids."

"Good trainer?"

"Should be. He's retired from active duty on the local PD K9 unit," Michael said with a shrug. "Sarai and Rory wanted a dog and I said that it would be trained, no questions. Just didn't expect a cop." He grinned at that like it was a joke. He watched the kids play with a toy that was used for working dogs to play with and sighed. "So… how does it feel to be back?"

"I'm just glad I can be," Reid replied honestly. He raised his brow and asked, "Did you know about the stipulation?"

"Most of what Ems knows I know," Michael offered. "I just don't make a fuss of it and let it be. Besides, I meant what I said in Naples." He looked at Reid with a pointed look.

"I know. You've never lied to me or anything like that." Reid has looked down at his feet as he replied to that. "You've always been there one way or another. Even when you were overseas. Just checking in with me."

"It bothered me that I felt helpless when you were in jail," Michael admitted. He put his hands in his pants pockets, imitating the posture Reid sometimes took. "Knowing that you were innocent despite what the evidence said… I felt horrible that I couldn't do for you what you did for me."

"Are you kidding me? You helped in more ways than one. You helped us catch the ones responsible," Reid protested. "And you helped catch Scratch."

Michael pursed his lips at Reid and glanced at him. He didn't say anything at first. He didn't have to since he had spoken of it enough to Reid. They had similar thoughts and feelings about what had happened and the choices made. He didn't regret much and he suspected that Alvez knew more than what he reported about Scratch, but he wasn't going to dwell on it. He learned a long time ago that bad things did happen but where it counted was how well you picked yourself up and moved forward. It was the hardest to learn from his and Sarai's shared trauma.

"I know it will still be there and I can't change what happened to me but… I think some things came out for the better," Reid admitted. He looked at his friend as he looked at the kids playing.

"They usually do when you have a good thing going, little brother."

Reid couldn't help but smile at that. He would have said something but Simmons came out followed by his boys. They saw the dog and they took off to join Henry and Aurora. He chuckled and said, "Looks like you might get into trouble after all, Mike."

Michael chuckled at that and looked at Simmons before giving a pat to the shoulder, "Just had to bring the rugrats didn't you?"

"You said bring everybody," Simmons pointed out with a grin.

"So I did," Michael admitted. He raised his arms in an 'oh well' gesture. "Well, not my fault with your kids."

"Like you can say no to any of them."

"I maintain order, thank you very much." Michael grinned at Simmons as they shared a joke brought on by their experiences working with IRT. "I did teach them a little order."

Simmons couldn't help but chuckle at that. "Fine. By the way, there is a dispute in the kitchen. Something about choice of wine or something." He frowned a little, not sure what it was about, "Some order could be used."

Michael gave a slight roll of his eyes. He sighed almost dramatically and looked at Reid, "I guess I have to go and play referee." He took his leave and left Simmons with Reid to watch the kids. He passed by Alvez and gave a slight smile and said, "Duty calls. Keep an eye on the kids."

"Yeah and you'll know about it even though you're not here," Alvez replied with a chuckle as he patted Michael on the arm as they passed each other. "More of your physics magic."

"That's Spence's thing," Michael countered before heading inside.

Alvez shook his head and grinned as he joined Simmons and Reid. Simmons was trying to wrangle his boys but it was difficult since Henry and Aurora were encouraging them to play. He stood by Reid and watched as Simmons was roped into a game of tag with the kids and Zeke. He crossed his arms over his chest and joked, "Does Mike always make you a babysitter?"

Reid made a slight smile as he turned to watch Aurora and admitted, "I like watching Rory. Henry looks after her when they play together." He glanced at Alvez and said, "I was there when she was born. Mike was on deployment."

"And now you'll get see yours," Alvez replied with a gentle pat to the back of Reid's shoulder.

"Yeah." Reid kept quiet about the statistics regarding miscarriage and carrying to term. Besides that was private and only a few people knew about it and two were good at keeping secrets. "And Gen is…" He made a slight face.

Alvez studied him and grinned, "Don't drag me into that conversation. I think your buddy Mike is better equipped or Simmons."

"Mike knows less than I do but he manages all right." Reid turned to watch Aurora as she called to Zeke. The dog bounded towards her like she was going to charge at her. He would have said something but the dog bolted to a stop and then sat panting. He watched as the girl said he was a good boy and patted the dog.

"You really okay, Reid?"

Reid shifted to look at Alvez. He knew people were going to keep asking him that question for some time. While it could be annoying, he saw the reasoning behind it. Genevieve was the one that reasonable about the whole thing and Michael just carried on like he usually did. Everyone else… it was all part of being friends and family. Apart from Michael, Alvez was the one that rooted him to the ground when he suffered the symptoms of PTSS. He understood what he felt. Looking at Alvez and replied, "Doing better. Some days are rough but… working through it."

"It's all anyone can do," Alvez replied knowingly. "Baby steps right?"

"Yeah." Reid nodded in acknowledgement. Alvez was right about that. Reid had foolishly once hurt his brother's feelings by disregarding that but… it was like what he had learned. And that was the experiences may be different in the details but the emotions and thoughts were the same. It's what made people able to relate. "That I'm working on."

"Work in progress."

"Ah that's Gen's expertise," Reid countered, "She's the artist."

"Who, I've heard, has done photography work around the world and most recently the photo and painting spread titles 'Heroes from all Sides.'," Alvez pointed out. "Garcia showed me the painting she did for the team a couple years ago."

Reid was used to people pointing out Genevieve's paintings. He had seen a few of them at art galleries and a museum art exhibit. Her photography work was what had people especially her spreads from when she travelled the world. He was proud of her and always had something to say to compliment her. "The one hanging in the main hall right?"

"Yeah. Really good work."

"It's what she does. She… chases dreams as she calls it." He looked at Alvez and added, "She looks for the good thing and paints it. After seeing what she has seen, I don't blame her. And the fact she's been with me for as long as she has, knowing what I do, been through…"

"Seems like someone knows exactly what you've gone through," Alvez pointed out, "A person who cares and loves you."

"I know. It's why, along with everyone else, I can feel like things are normal." Reid put his hands in his pants pockets. He gave a slight smile at Alvez. "Friends and family."

Alvez gave a slight smile and nodded, "Yeah."

They shared a look of understanding before Michael came back with JJ in tow to announce that dinner was ready. Reid was ready for Aurora when she came running towards him. He picked her up as Henry came to walk beside him and he was followed by Simmons and his boys. Together they went into the house to the dining room where Sarai and Rossi were waiting with a good spread on the table and both looking like they agreed to disagree on whatever it was they were fighting over.

Reid smiled as he was joined by Genevieve and he hugged Aurora as she hugged him. He looked at his friends and family as they took their seats at the table with Michael at the head. He put his goddaughter down in the seat next to him and helped Genevieve into hers before taking his. He looked down the table and couldn't help but smile at the fact that everyone was there. He turned his attention to Michael who was saying, "Now I hope you don't mind but I would like to say the blessing before we get started."

Reid couldn't help but smile. Never without fail did his best friend and brother forget to say a prayer. It was one of those things that had him baffled since he didn't really believe in it but he respected his friend and it was obvious the team did and they joined hands. As Michael thanked God that all of their friends and family could be together, Reid felt contentment. It was as was discussed on the plane. His experiences made him who he was and gave him avenues to further choices. He could move forward on this with his friends and family.

 _Man maintains his balance, poise, and sense of security only as he is moving forward._ – Maxwell Maltz

* * *

 **A/N:** Just the team arriving home after the case in Naples and a family dinner at Michael's house. Reid knows now he can move past this. Tag to To a Better Place. Enjoy.


	4. 13-03 Little Angels

**Little Angels**

 _A father is a man who expects his son to be as good a man as he meant to be._ \- Frank A. Clark

It was late and the team had just wrapped up the case in Detroit. Merza had been arrested for the murder of three men and all of them had been clients of Kimberly Desmond. The twist in the case was that the unsub was the girl's biological father.

Matt Simmons sat back in his seat as he thought about that while they were flying back to DC. He thought about their unsub and why he did what he did. On some level Simmons could understand the guy. He wanted his daughter to turn out better than what she was doing. But that didn't excuse the fact that he murdered three men after castrating them and torturing them.

He had also been made uncomfortable by the girl and her comments about his relationship with his wife. Simmons loved his wife and kids. He loved the fact that he was home more often to see them and be able to be husband and father. He didn't feel trapped or anything like it. Still it was unnerving and his thoughts were running rampart and he couldn't really sleep on the trip back.

Looking around, Simmons noticed that most of the team was asleep except for a couple that were relaxing. His eyes flitted over them until he noticed Michael and he couldn't help but give a slight smile. He had gotten to know the man when he joined IRT and found him to be unassuming in a lot of things; he was always quiet and observing. When addressed or given a job to do, he did it and often surprised the team but providing a solution they hadn't thought of. They had become close friends, bonding mostly over the fact that they both knew tactics in the field and they were both fathers. It seemed time to have a conversation and Simmons stood up and slowly made his way over.

Michael was sitting in his seat in position to observe the entire plane. Simmons had no doubt that he could see him coming despite the fact that it was obvious Michael was concentrating on the book on his lap and he was wearing his sound cancelling headphones. Simmons remembered the first time he wore them on the plane in IRT. Jack Garrett thought he was a little crazy but they proved handy for Michael to concentrate when he put together their geographical profile. The team also thought that he had something bugged in them to help him hear what was going on but that was disproven when they saw they were just normal headphones and nothing special had been done to them. It had Simmons laugh when Alvez thought the same thing and was proven wrong.

Simmons approached and looked down at Michael and hi book. He recognized it as one of the first editions that he brought to read during downtime. And that was at the enforced normal pace rather than the speed reading he and Reid did when they were on a case. Michael had claimed that a field agent should have something outside of law enforcement to wind down so they didn't burn out. For him, if it wasn't playing piano it was reading or playing with his three-year-old daughter, Aurora. Simmons took the seat across from Michael.

"The doctor is real in."

Simmons chuckled at the reference to Charlie Brown. "I'm willing to wait if you need to finish a chapter."

"And you're implying that I have OCD, Simmons. Which I don't," Michael replied as he finished his page. He tucked in the old bookmark to keep his place and removed his headphones and hung them around his neck. "What's up, Matt?"

Simmons shrugged slightly as he looked at Michael. His friend had taken off his blazer and was was looking comfortable in the form fitting shirt, a carryover from IRT days. "Just... the case."

"Thinking about Merza and his twisted and yet understandable reasoning for murdering three men whom he believed was responsible for turning his daughter into a whore?"

Simmons opened his mouth to point out the technical difference of Kimberly's profession but decided against it. There were some things that Michael didn't bend on. He knew the PC term for it but that didn't mean that he agreed with it. He gave a slight nod and replied, "I can understand how he felt but..."

"He was a sadist, Matt," Michael replied as he adjusted his hands on his lap. "As much as we want to point out the reasoning and claim it is such... in the end he's still a murderer."

"But I get how he feels, Mike. He wanted his daughter to be something better than he was but ends up finding out that it didn't end that way when he was released from prison." Simmons sat back in his seat as he spoke in low tones so that the rest of the team didn't listen to the conversation. "I think it would be a hard blow."

Michael looked at Simmons and replied, "And I don't doubt that. You're a father. You want the boys and the twins to grow up into good people. You and your wife probably worry about whether or not they are learning how to be good people."

"And you don't?"

It was meant as a joke but it came out a little harsher than Simmons intended. It didn't faze Michael since they had been through similar exchanges before. They thought about things differently but in the end, they agreed on a few things. Michael replied, "I worry all the time. I worry about whether or not I am being a good father because of the job that I do and the fact I occasionally remember the worst moments in my time over there. I am afraid that my daughter will become scared of me."

"Rory loves you."

"And nothing I more touching than the innocent love of a child," Michael replied, "But it is scary." He paused and swallowed slightly as he looked out the window of the plane. Once he found his thoughts he turned back to Simmons and continued, "I am scared of whether or not I am doing a good job. I believe Sarai is way better at the parenting thing than me Must be a mom thing."

"Could be a woman thing," Simmons joked.

Michael hummed a laugh, "Maybe. Anyway, I see where you're going with this line of thought. As a parent, we want what is best for our kids. We teach them right from wrong and what it means to suffer consequences but in the end..." He gave a slight half smile and sighed, "It's like how God is with us. We know His word so there is no excuse but we still have the choice to choose him. And we have to live with it."

"So, you are saying this was another God's will thing?"

"Just an example," Michael replied giving a slight wave of his hand. "Th point is that God is a parent too. I was trying to explain it in a manner that I understood."

"Don't worry about it. I think I got it," Simmons replied giving a wave of reassurance. "I guess we all we can do it what we can and in the end..."

"A better metaphor would be that the bird has to leave the nest."

Simmons and Michael shared a laugh at that. Simmons was the first to recover saying, "I guess there's plenty of reference for Reid."

Michael chuckled, "Spence is stubborn on a lot of things. When he met Gen, he kept her a secret from the team because he wanted to find his way through a relationship on his own. Same might be for the baby when it comes." He glanced at Reid to make sure he was still asleep and leaned forward so only Simmons could hear and joked, "But the first time he is on diaper duty..."

"He'll come running."

It was another round of shared laughs and Simmons felt the tension from earlier seemed to have died down. That was another thing talking to Michael Nassar. The man had a way of calming people even with simple conversation. Despite the fact that they could end up in an awkward moment like Reid did when he started rambling, the conversation always took to a resolved calm. Simmons figured it had to do with the man's presence, a thing that seemed rather strange considering the man had been a team leader in battle conditions and commanded men that could get an attitude and yet he always commanded their attention. Whatever the reason, it seemed to work.

Michael was humming to himself and looking down at the cover of his book before he asked, "So... are you still worried about the kids?"

"A little."

"Matt," Michael looked up and leaned forward. "Just... live."

Simmons frowned at that, "What do you mean?"

Michael paused a bit as if to think about how to phrase his answer. Simmons could tell that it was something important since he was always deliberate with his word choices. Finally, Michael said, "I know you're going to worry. You're a parent. It's what we do when it involves our kids. But we can't worry about too much of the what ifs. Statistically, no one person can predict more than a few seconds into the future."

"I think you're the exception, Mike," Simmons teased.

"Still," Michael replied after giving a slight smile, "The point is that if we worry too much about the what ifs, we forget to focus on the here and now. What is important now. For me, it's knowing that any second I can spend with Rory, it's the most important thing in the world. Maybe Sarai and I both had a hard lesson learned when we were in Afghan, but... we live each day thankful and to the fullest. You should do the same with your family. Treasure every moment."

Simmons studied Michael. A cynic would have asked what the hell did he know but Simmons was privy to the fact that Michael had learned hard lessons. Michael was right about what he was saying and Simmons loved the fact that he could spend more time home now that he was stateside. He had a more or less normal schedule and he loved every moment with his kids. He looked at Michael and asked, "Did you know about what Kimberly said to me?"

"I had a few guesses," Michael admitted. He knew that Simmons would want a better explanation and he added, "Her body language said it and she was trying to read you like we do our unsubs. But whatever it was she said, Matt, I know you will never betray your wife.

"You seem confident in that."

"Because I believe that you would act upon the word that has been embedded in all of us; your morality Matt." Michael straightened up to stretch slightly. "You're a good man and you have a good wife and I could tell that you are both crazy for each other. The proof being the ragamuffins and the twins." He grinned to show that he was teasing Simmons. "When we land, go home, hug your wife and tell her how you really feel. Then do the same for your kids and enjoy each moment."

"I suppose you're doing the same?"

"Are you kidding? I'm going to bed." Michael grinned as he said it. He then said, "Yeah. I'm going home to my wife who married me out of all people she knew. Show how much I love her and by then my little whirlwind in curls will come in and insist on joining us."

"Sounds like a plan," Simmons replied.

"Probably the most brilliant I'll ever have concerning the fairer sex. I'm considered a genius and I still can't figure out how women tick."

"I think that's a universal constant, Mike," Simmons replied with a pat to the man's shoulder. "One of those things we have to do trial by fire."

"But worth the journey with the right woman." Michael smiled before he sobered and said, "Just remember to cherish each moment, Matt. Time is cruel in that it can pass in the blink of an eye and proves that we don't have all the time in the world."

Simmons nodded and thought about it while Michael put his headphones back on to catch a few minutes of sleep. He felt better with their conversation having been said. Michael was right and it was a bit surprising on the level that he was newer in the parent gig but he seemed wiser in other things. Simmons knew his friend was right though in that he loved his wife and kids. He felt blessed to being in that position and no doubt Michael would have something to say like Scripture about it. Simmons got it.

He felt better about it and was able to make it home early in the morning to find his wife still in bed. He took Michael's advice and let her know how much he loved her. He had barely enough time before he was bombarded with his kids bursting into the room. He figured that Michael was right in that he had to live in the moments with his kids even though he had to teach them how to be people. He would enjoy being with his little angels.

 _I have learned that raising children is the single most difficult thing in the world to do. It takes hard work, love, luck, and a lot of energy, and it is the most rewarding experience that you can ever have._ \- Janet Reno

* * *

 **A/N:** Simmons has some thoughts about the case in Detroit and has a chat with Michael on the way back. Tag to Blue Angel. Enjoy.


	5. 13-04 Strengthening App

**Strengthening App**

 _The real man smiles in trouble, gathers strength from distress, and grows brave by reflection._ \- Thomas Paine

"Hey, you alright?"

Michael Nassar looked away from the window of the jet to see Emily Prentiss looking down at him. He gave a gesture for her to have a seat and replied, "Just thinking."

"Uh oh. We're in trouble," Emily teased as she took the seat across from him. "Cause every time you think we end up getting more paperwork."

"I would think you'd appreciate the dotting the t's and crossing the i's, Ems," Michael replied as he adjusted his position. "DHS certainly appreciated my mapping out the crime scenes." He made a slight sound and glanced out the window.

Emily watched him and asked, "Seriously, you okay?"

Michael turned to look at Emily and gave a slight shake, "Not really." He paused to see if she would speak. When she waited, he continued as he leaned forward, "Just... reminded of a few bad experiences with contractors. Including Peakstone."

"I'm glad you were with me," Emily admitted, "And I didn't mean to put you on the spot making you come with me." She put on an apologetic face.

"I knew what I was getting into when you asked me to stay on," Michael replied with a slight smile. He lowered his voice as he added, "And you did ask me to be security of a sorts."

"That was only for the situation with Reid..." Emily stopped when she looked at Michael to find him grinning at her. She made a slight face and had they been kids she would have punched him in the shoulder. She could now and she understood why his sister almost wanted to strangle him when they first met in Austin. "You really like pushing it."

"Kept me alive in Afghan and... my team trusted that about me."

"Do you still..."

"Yes," Michael replied softly. He sighed a little and continued, "That's the thing about being the team leader. Maintain command but still make yourself accessible to them. Show them that you have their back and they will do the same. And they were until the end. Even Phillips."

"How is he?"

"Last I heard he was... doing okay." Michael looked upwards and frowned slightly. He sighed again and looked out the window.

Emily watched him silently. She figured that he would be affected by this latest case. He didn't really want to go to Peakstone with her but he did without complaining. When they arrived, she had Michael run through the scene, mapping everything and had him walk her through it with Alvez. He agreed with Reid when it was suggested that the unsub used a drone.

"I had worked with Peakstone a couple of times and Luke is right," Michael said as he stared absently out the window. He then turned and looked at Emily, "They are a different breed and... one of the reasons I refused to work with them after the last time."

"The DHS Peakstone contact seemed to know you."

"Of course." Michael turned to face Emily and leaned forward. "Don't get me wrong, Ems. With the military resources stretched as thin as they were, we were forced to rely on contractors. The sad thing about it is that because they are privatized, they are not held to the same regulations as regular army. And that leaves for a lot of arrogance to breed." He gave a wry smile that was similar to Reid's. "It's why I was... reminding him of that."

Emily nodded at that. When they went to see the contact at Peakstone, the man gave an almost sardonic smile at Michael. It was like he was happy to see him. The conversation was polite but she could feel the tension in the room and it had nothing to do with the fact that the company was refusing to give the name of their unsub. Michael refused to be baited by Peakstone but he did manage to leave a parting shot that ended up coming true.

"You know, I joined the army because I didn't find satisfaction in what I was doing, the traditional sort of jobs associated with a proven genius."

Emily looked to find Michael looking at her. She replied, "Yeah. Garcia told me you had been practicing law for six months and then up and quit."

"I was disillusioned," Michael replied with a slight smile. "I loved the law. I like order in general. The way how everything has its own place and function and when it is not doing what it's supposed to do, I try to fix it. With the way how things were even with the most honorable of attorneys... didn't quite fit."

"So, you joined the military and... did what you did. Still do."

"In a modified sense," Michael replied with a slight smile. "My CO likes the idea of having a trained operator in the art of criminal profiling." He gave a slight look at Emily and added, "I don't know what you said to him and DIA to get them to allow me to be stationed as a liaison with the BAU but... it has been a blessing."

Emily smiled at that. She didn't know how much he knew of the circumstances that led to his employ with the BAU but she was glad to have his presence there and when JJ had been assigned to Afghanistan, he had been there to look after her. He was a good man. "Well I'm glad you're with us too, Mike. I know Reid is happy you're here."

"Spence has been able to handle himself without me. Taught him that much at Caltech," Michael replied with a slight smile. He looked over to see his best friend sitting and reading. He looked back at Emily, "I'm really glad the brass reinstated him. This... is his life apart from his family. He was meant to do this."

"And you aren't?"

"I'm just passing through."

Emily shook her head at that. "No. You're important too. It is like seeing a complete person with you and Reid working together. But you're both unique when apart. To be honest, I never thought I would meet a genius who likes to play football and play piano while serving."

"Reality surpasses..."

"Expectations."

They both shared a laugh at that. Emily looked at Michael and studied him. "I'm glad you're here, Mike. And you did a good job on the case. You read the situation before we did and acted and was there to prevent Peakstone from killing a loose end."

"I knew how they operated in terms of missions, Ems," Michael replied, "And... the sad thing is that... I could see where Jake was coming from." He looked at Emily with a slight expression as he continued, "I mean I knew what to expect when I signed up and was shipped out. I was trained for the possibility of shooting someone and killing them. When faced with the reality of it... I can see how the kid felt.

"They shouldn't have misled the operators. The sad thing is I've met a few enlisted that treated the war over there like a videogame. When we stop thinking of people as people and instead think of them as pixels on a screen... we lose what makes us human."

Emily looked at Michael as he looked at her in a thoughtful manner. He obviously had time to think about this and he made no bones about being Christian. She had seen him answer the question of how he could be a soldier and a Christian. He was that confident in his faith and it carried out in how he interacted with the team. She remembered the dinner he invited the team to after their first case back together. She asked, "Do you want to go back?"

"Sometimes I want to be back with the team I was reassigned to but... looking at it now..." Michael thought about it a little. "They were doing fine without me and they don't need me. I may miss it a little but I'm here and if it is where I'm supposed to be, I trust that God guides me." He smiled a little and added, "I actually want to stay on the team. I like the arrangement."

"No kidding. You get to see Rory more. Be with Sarai."

"No doubt." Michael chuckled as he leaned back in his seat. "Rory told me she likes Emmie because she made it so her baba is home."

Emily smiled and wanted to laugh a little. She knew that Michael's daughter Aurora had picked out her way of referring to the team. She was Emmie. The others made her want to laugh. "She is something," she replied.

"She and Sarai..." Michael tapped the place over his heart. "At least we are doing something to make the world a bit safer in this job. Right?"

Emily nodded after a moment. There were times that they all had their doubts but in the end, they were doing good. What they learned, they applied it to the next case to catch the unsub. "I think you should keep that in mind. It's a good reason to stay."

Emily stood up and gave a pat on his shoulder before heading back to her seat to deal with some paperwork. Michael watched her leave before getting up to stretch. He sidled up the aisle and sat across from his best friend. He grinned when Reid didn't even notice that he was there. Instead, he took the time to look at the eat of the team.

He had seen a lot of things in Afghan. The good, the bad, and the ugly. That didn't exactly change when he came back. It was the same things but just different. It was like what he had told Reid about relating in experiences. The details and circumstances were different but the feelings were the same. Going to the Silicon Valley and meeting with the Peakstone representative again... it struck a nerve.

There were a lot of things that he had seen and done that his friends and family would never know about. They couldn't because of the nature of his missions. The country wouldn't know because they didn't want to know or thought that they wouldn't do a thing like that. The phrase ignorance was bliss rang true. It was why he could understand why the unsub reacted the way he did. Luke and Simmons understood in terms of service and what it meant to work black ops and such. It had him wonder if he would have turned out like the unsub. Looking at Reid, Michael smiled as he thought about how thankful he was to have what he had. Settling back, he was prepared to go to sleep, pulling out his noise cancelling headphones.

"Though sleep is called our best friend, it is a friend who often keeps us waiting."

Michael opened his eyes and narrowed them at Reid who was looking at him with a grin on his face. He replied, "Sleep is that golden chain ties health and our bodies together. Beat that with another from Jules Verne."

"Did you just quote Thomas Dekker?"

It turned into a playful back and forth between the two friends. Emily watched from her seat and couldn't help but smile. They had been through some tough times but with Michael there, in addition to Simmons, it was like the attitudes of the team shifted. They were always there to do the job but it was like it changed for the better. The team seemed stronger for it.

 _Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference._ \- Winston Churchill

* * *

 **A/N:** Emily and Mike talk on the way back from Silicon Valley. At lot of changes have happened to the team but they have come out stronger than ever. Tag to Killer App.


	6. 13-05 Lucky Blessings

**Lucky Blessings**

 _Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life._ – Omar Khayyam

"You know you're not on duty."

Michael Nassar looked up to see Penelope Garcia looking down at him with that endearing smile he liked about her. He smiled back as he adjusted the beer he was balancing on his knee and replied, "Old habits Penny Rose."

Garcia smiled at the pet name Michael had given her a long time ago when he had been called on a case consultation. Actually he called her 'Miss Penny' and bowed at her. It was not mocking but the result of good manners. Later he called her Penny Rose when he gave her a rose for her birthday. She thought he was flirting but she knew that he loved his wife and would never cheat on her. It was more of being affectionate in friendship and appreciative of what she could do.

Looking at him, she gave him a mock smack on his shoulder, "You're supposed to live life and get respectably drunk." She plopped down on the couch next to him.

"I drink but not to get drunk, my dear," Michael replied smiling as he lifted his beer before taking a sip from the bottle.

"Says the man who drank and actually sang karaoke in front of everyone," Garcia replied smiling. She chuckled when he started to laugh softly as he remembered that. She sobered and looked at him. She rubbed his shoulder, "Thank you for the picture and the rose."

"I was hoping to make your day less dreary Penny Rose," Michael replied as he sobered. He adjusted his position to get a good look at Garcia. "I… went looking into what happened ten years ago with you. Makes me wish the bastard was still alive. Then I would take care of him myself." He stared at her to indicate what he meant.

Garcia immediately said, "I know you would but…" She closed her mouth and thought about what she wanted to say and finally continued, "I know you would do anything to protect those close to you. I was there when Reid was arrested and sent to prison and what you did for Emily and the team but… I don't think I could stand you being _that_ guy."

"What do you mean, Penny Rose?"

"What I mean is… you are you because you don't go down that dark road even when you want to and if I had known you then… I think you may have and you wouldn't be the tall, dark and handsome that I know now and… I don't think I could stand that." Garcia pursed her lips in a worried expression as she stared at Michael. "I like the tall, dark and handsome that has manners that I thought didn't exist anymore and the heart of a lion."

Michael looked at Garcia and smiled gently. "Didn't know you saw me that, Penny. I always thought Spence was the lion."

"You are too. You and Reid are so much alike but different," Garcia said, confirming what everyone knew about Michael and Reid. "I'm really glad that you joined the BAU, even if you still are in the army."

"I'm glad too," Michael admitted. "I like being home regularly. Oh, before I forget." He pulled out his cell phone and opened the app for the camera. He flipped to what he wanted and showed her the video he took of his daughter sitting at the piano at home and playing her first tune. "Now that is a budding musical genius."

Garcia couldn't help but coo at the video of Aurora playing 'Mary had a Little Lamb' on the piano that she knew Michael was adamant about its upkeep. "She is so adorable. I am simply overwhelmed by the cuteness. First Derek's little Hank and now Rory."

Michael hummed as he smiled, letting Garcia watch the video. He studied her and took a moment to look at the rest of the team engaged in conversation, smiles on their faces. He spotted his practically little brother talking to JJ in the corner. No doubt it was about Henry and quite possibly a day out. Rossi was talking to Tara and Emily and Alvez and Simmons were having an animated discussion about something. He turned back to Garcia as she crooned and handed him back his phone saying, "I don't know how you managed to have something that cute."

"I wonder that myself," Michael replied as he put his phone back into his jacket pocket. "I wonder how I could be blessed having Sarai as my wife and then Rory. Especially after the things I've seen and done and bene through." He took another sip of his beer. "But I did learn something, Penny."

"And what is that my handsome hunk?" Garcia couldn't resist teasing him with her nicknames.

"That the things that have happened… they don't go away." He paused since he didn't want to distress her but she was listening to him with rapt attention. He continued, "They don't go away. They become a part of us, teach us about ourselves and in the end we make the choice of whether or not to learn and move forward."

"That is very philosophical," Garcia replied looking like an impressed grad student. "I suppose you had to do that a lot?"

"Very much so especially after Kandahar," Michael admitted. "It says something that Sarai and I can talk about it and we do. I like to think that we have managed to overcome a few obstacles. Of course a relationship is a work in progress. Takes effort on both sides." He gave a slight smile.

"How is it that you manage to make insecurities seem like a good thing?"

"Mechanical genius." Michael grinned and laughed a little, making Garcia laugh with him. "That and Sophie managed to teach me a few things about socializing. Helped when I met Spence at Caltech."

Garcia smiled as she got to her feet. "And look at you now." She stood in front of Michael and stared at him like a close friend or sister would at their sibling. "I'm really glad you're here, Mike."

Michael raised his beer at Garcia. "And I'll be here as long as I can," he said gently and with certainty. "I guess you better get to living life with fullness and happiness. Love you Penny Rose."

Michael watched as Garcia went about and checking on everyone's drink and giving refills as necessary. He couldn't help but smile at the fact that everyone was happy being together. They were a family and such a thing was a good thing and he figured that God would be approving since apart from loving Him with all your heart, mind and soul, people were to love one another. Even with the case being what it was and his concern over Garcia, things worked out.

"Don't tell me you aren't mingling."

Michael chuckled when he was joined by his friend and little brother, Spencer Reid. He replied, "That was when we were younger."

"And you still manage to get women to turn their heads without trying," Reid pointed out as he gave a slight gesture in Garcia's direction.

Michael eyed Reid and countered, "You are getting pretty big for your britches, little brother. You were never like this when we got into trouble."

"Times change," Reid offered with a shrug.

Michael nodded in agreement as he took a sip of his beer. He looked at Reid inquisitively more to gauge if he was okay. True the six weeks helped but he was concerned about his little brother. He always saw Reid as the more innocent of the two of them and while it sounded ridiculous, it was just something that he saw and liked and kind of made a promise to keep it intact. It was weird but Reid got it and appreciated Michael's attempts to teach him how to be normal. Michael thought about the last case and probed gently, "Last case seemed to hit a spot. And I know about Penny."

Reid nodded, "It was."

"You were flustered like when I had to strong arm you."

"You don't have to be nice about letting me have it." Reid looked at Michael with a pointed look. "I deserved it."

"No."

Reid gave a slight eye roll at that. He really did think he deserved a talking to then. "Come on, Mike. You and I both know you are just as human as the rest of us. No need to be tough guy."

"And if I weren't, you'd be in trouble more often," Michael replied with grin. "I get it and I was concerned about Penny Rose and we talked. I am worried about you. I know you've been working through it and hiding quite a bit for Gen's sake. I just…" He leaned forward and gave a shrug of his shoulders.

"I was upset that the mental hospital saw through Ferrell's lies and let him go on supervised home visits and the methods they used…" Reid pursed his lips and looked away.

"Hey, easy there, cowboy. I get it. I get that way with protocol at the FOBs. Not everything is perfect."

Reid made a slight sound that came out like a wry chuckle, "Yeah and they should learn from it."

"Most cases." Michael gave a slight shrug before taking another sip of his beer. "So… have you convinced Gen to find out if it is a boy or a girl?"

"That is one surprise I definitely want to keep. She does too." Reid smiled at that.

Michael laughed with Reid and they chatted more about kids in general to the Aurora and her accomplishment at piano. Reid teased Michael about having a musical genius of a daughter and that she would be better at it than he was. Michael merely smiled and implied that he would do worse when baby Reid came along and implied that it would be acting. It had Reid wince but laughing a bit at it, making him look more forward to the baby arriving.

It was over too soon when Michael felt his cell phone buzz. He pulled it out and took a look at it. He sobered instantly as he read the message. He looked up to see Reid looking at him with a serious expression and asking, "Got a call?"

Michael stood up, "Yeah. Spence can you…"

"Look after Sarai and Rory? Always." Reid patted Michael on the shoulder. He watched as Michael slunk to where Emily was and whisper in her ear. He knew Michael would sneak out and Emily would make the apologies later.

It wasn't like they didn't know. Reid figured it was just a means of making it less painful for everyone. His big brother was like that, thinking about everyone else's wellbeing. He just didn't expect that Michael would get a call. He realized that he had gotten used to the idea of Michael being there and forgot that he was still under the employ of the United States Army. They all had.

Reid sighed as he reminded himself of the role he had taken up when Sarai found out she was pregnant and Michael had been deployed. He didn't regret it but he knew it was a hard thing to swallow since he had a vague idea of what Michael did for the army. And he thought that it was a good thing his big brother gave the advice he did. It was what made him who he was and it had a way of making the people around him think and actually be positive. Reid felt his lip twitch as he saw Michael give Garcia a brotherly peck on the cheek before slipping out.

Reid nodded and mentally prepared to give the bad news though he was certain that Michael would be phoning Sarai right now. He thought about what he could do to help Rory keep her mind off the fact her father had to go and what he was doing with his life. He couldn't help but smile slightly when he felt Garcia rub him on the shoulder and give him a look of understanding. He nodded and joined her as they lived in the moment.

 _Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment._ – Buddha

* * *

 **A/N:** The team is hanging out with Garcia after the case in Florida. Tag to Lucky Strikes.


	7. 13-06 Bunker News

**Bunker News**

 _If you don't ponder the end of the world on a regular basis, I don't think you're really human._ – Edan Lepucki

 _As you can see… nothing much going on._

"So why the deployment?" Genevieve looked at the screen of the laptop to study the person on the screen. "You get a call and you're doing nothing."

 _You know I can't tell you that, Gen. But I am on call._

Genevieve sighed as she sat back in her seat on the couch. She slouched to relieve pressure on her back and placed a hand on her baby bump. She knew that her brother-in-law couldn't say much about his official job. Some things she just didn't get but she knew there was always a purpose. "I know but… Can you tell Sarai?"

 _I told her enough and… I know it won't stop her from worrying. She may be used to it since she spent time with me in country before I became a little domesticated, but… I know. So how are things since I left?_

Genevieve sighed at that and leaned to look over the couch towards the bedroom. She was surprised that her husband hadn't woken up to talk to his practically older brother. She replied, "Spencer misses you. He has been more somber."

 _I'm guessing everyone feels like that. Even my Penny Rose._

"Penelope," Genevieve began as she tried to search for the right words before giving up and saying, "She was upset but I think some well-timed emails helped. She is looking for a new place. Something about her vision being ruined by naked kung fu." She frowned a little at that as she tried to recall how she heard it. She looked at the screen when she heard chuckling.

 _I think I get the picture. I just… I just wanted to spare a lot of…_

"I know," Genevieve replied with a knowing smile. She watched the look that came across Michael's face and she added, "You aren't too different from Spencer. You use reason and logic but the heart is in there. Just not the way that most people expect."

 _You're not the first to say that to me. That goes to my sister Sophia when she first met Spence and she called him my twin._

Genevieve chuckled at that. She put a hand on her abdomen as she adjusted her seat. She gave a slight sigh of contentment as she sobered slightly. "I guess that things are tame here compared to over there."

 _More likely since when you put me and Spence together…_

"I remember Halloween," Genevieve replied with another knowing look. She shook her head as she looked at the smiling face. "It was funny. Especially that mustache you grew for one day and one day only."

 _One of Spencer's best._

"I'm glad you kept your tradition up. It's been helping him. Even now with this first case since you deployed."

 _What happened?_

"Well…" Genevieve looked over towards the room. She held her breath as she listened for any signs of movement. She turned back towards the screen. "The case had to do with four professional women being kidnapped but they also tied to kidnappings of young girls that were pregnant. They were kept in a bunker."

 _Oh. The preppers and the survivalists._

"You know?"

 _Know the type. Once someone asked me to construct plans for a bunker. I said no since I think it's a lot of nonsense and the whole doomsday clock is just one more thing to make people afraid of the world._

"It is scary," Genevieve pointed out gently. "You and I know it pretty well and Spencer… he's bene through a lot. The whole team has." She rubbed her abdomen. She thought about what she wanted to say and while she knew that Michael was on a time limit probably, she knew he was patient when people were coming up with answers. Finally she said, "Out of curiosity, have you ever thought that maybe the doomsday sayers may be right?"

She held her breath when she say the look that Michael was giving her. She could tell he was thinking about his answer. No doubt, before he was domesticated as he would say, he just told it to you straight. Reid did the same. It seemed to almost be a stereotype of geniuses. The intellect left little room for consideration of feelings but for Michael she knew he had a touch Asperger's that contributed that though some would probably call it being a sociopath since he was blind still to some social cues. He was lucky that the team understood that and knew he meant no harm if he didn't respond like most people would. She waited while he construed his answer.

 _I believe that the world will end. It is written in the Bible and that's enough to scare people since the imagery is intense. Book of Revelations and all… I believe it will end but not when we think it will._

"The God's own time thing?"

 _Don't knock Him or His son. And the power of prayer… Let's just say that I kind of know when Sarai has been praying for me and the team. But yeah. God has His own time on things and what he knows, we only know a fraction of it. Can't comprehend it. I know it sounds weird coming from a mechanical genius who deals in certainty and it sure as shooting messes with Spence's head._

"I know that all too well. I do the same and… I'm glad we can talk about God."

 _Always, Gen. You know, Sophie used to say it was the greatest miracle that a genius, a scientist believed in the basic truths of God and Jesus. She was talking about me since I accepted it despite the fact that it was asking me to believe something that couldn't be proven with scientific method._

 _But going back to what you asked, I know it will happen and while I worry a little, my biggest concern is the day in front of me. Teaching Rory what her mother and I know about Him and letting her make the commitment when she is ready. I take the opportunity when it comes to me. I find it fun to talk with our sniper and we pull out our Bibles and have a go. That's in between reading on military law, international law and the occasional op plans._

Genevieve grinned and chuckled at that. She nodded hearing his words and listening. She looked off to the side as she thought about things.

 _Is this about my niece or nephew that will be making an appearance come February?_

"A little. And Spencer."

 _Spence will come to his own understanding. Like I said, don't knock the power of prayer. And don't worry about the baby. Already things are going great. Kid has a mom who is already teaching them the Word._

"How do you…?"

 _Sarai. We rarely keep secrets like that._

Genevieve knew he said that to clarify that he didn't keep secrets like what she did when she was resting and listening to the audio scriptures she had. She also followed through on Reid's assertion that Beethoven was a good choice and Michael didn't argue with that. There were some secrets he had to keep and while anyone could ask Reid, they didn't and Reid knew he could but didn't. She hummed a chuckle, "And here I was thinking you used your operator talents."

 _Nah. Simple observation._

Genevieve smiled, "You always could make me laugh."

 _Huh. And here I was thinking Spence was the funny one._

Genevieve shook her head in bemusement. "I'm glad we could have these chats but… I would think you want to talk to your family."

 _You're family too, Gen. You married my lil' brother. Then there's the team. I try to make sure I let Penny Rose know things are okay. And I spoke to Sarai and my little whirlwind with curls._

"Spencer played piano with her the song you were composing."

 _I know. It was a piece I was working on to teach her how to play. Been working on teaching her how to read music. I know she's three but she speaks Arabic and Farsi since we speak it around her and Hadasa has been teaching her Hebrew. Little sponges first five years._

Genevieve smiled and hummed at that. She then thought about something and asked, "So the kids that were born in the bunker…"

 _They would have been conditioned to accept what they had been told was the truth. In adults, it's repetitive assertion and highly suggestive state. For the teens that were abducted, makes sense. I mean… I was witness to a girl, American, who was convinced to become a suicide bomber in Turkey. We are not infallible beings, Gen. We are susceptible to the junk out there. There are radicals here that truly believe the whole 'if you martyr yourself for the cause you'll be in paradise'. We are programmable._

"Put that way now makes it sound scary."

 _Don't worry. The kid will be fine. You and Spence both had good heads on those shoulders. Remember that._

Genevieve sighed in relief. "I know. And thank you."

 _What family does? Right, Spence?_

She wanted to laugh at the deliberate stressing of his Texan twang. He did that on occasion more to have fun. Sometimes when he was stressed it came out. Normally, it was soft but you could still hear it. She was curious how the locals in Afghan thought of it when they heard him speaking Pashto or whatever language he used.

Hearing his reference to Reid, she shifted to see that Reid had come out looking a little tired but awake and happy to see his friend. She smiled and said, "Well, I'll leave you both to finish this conversation while I make dinner."

 _If you're making that chicken thing you do, then I am jealous._

Genevieve laughed at that as she got up to make room for Reid to sit and talk to Michael. She walked to the kitchen where she could observe Reid talking to his friend and brother. She heard him start to talk about his latest case. That was going to go on for a few minutes. She smiled as she got out food and pots and pans.

Michael was right that there were scary things in the world. He was scared, everyone was scared. The difference was that rather than he run away from it, he faced it, made preparations. He was well aware that he couldn't control everything. She was scared at the prospect of becoming a parent, but she was also full of joy. She knew that even with all the scary things in the world, she still had people that mattered the most to help her see it through.

She looked up when she heard Reid give a high pitched indignant protest. She tried hard not to laugh since she could hear Michael laughing and teasing her husband. Things would be okay with people like Michael making sure the world was a safer place and not on the verge of destruction.

 _You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary._ – Revelations 2:3

* * *

 **A/N:** Genevieve talks to Mike about her thoughts after hearing about the case. Tag to The Bunker. Enjoy.


	8. 13-07 Life in Bones

**Life in Bones**

 _My brother is one of my true heroes. Steady and sober where I am impulsive and emotional._ \- Mark McKinnon

It had been a long day after getting back from the case in Austin. It had been nice to see Sophia Langston again and she had been one of the detectives assigned to the case as the chief's right hand. It was a bright spot for Spencer Reid even if she teased him like she would her brother. Reid paused as he put his keys in the bowl on the table near the door.

Reid didn't have any blood siblings but he had one in Michael Nassar and that extended to Sophia and by some extension Michael's father. They treated him like family and Michael never hesitated to introduce him as his little brother even though it was obvious that they were nothing alike. But they were alike in many things and they were different and when put together, they made a whole.

A clatter caught Reid's attention and he heard his wife's voice, "That you, Speedy?"

Reid looked up and replied, "Yeah. I just got in."

At that moment the cats came running to the door. Missy galloped followed by the slower and sedately walk of Charlie. Missy started squeaking uncontrollably, rearing up on her hind legs, begging for attention. Charlie just took a seat and look unimpressed to the world.

Knowing that Missy would keep at it until she got what she wanted, Reid bent down and scooped her up and immediately she climbed to sit on his shoulder. He picked up Charlie and held him in his arms like a football and immediately the tabby started purring, causing Reid to roll his eyes slightly. He was a pushover with the cats but he liked them anyway. He hummed when Missy started purring while rubbing her face against his neck.

He walked over to the dining area where he found his wife and love, Genevieve, trying to bend over and pick up the pencils that had fallen. It was normally an easy job to do but lately... Being the gentleman, he put Charlie on the empty chair and reached down to pick them up while Missy readjusted with the movement. He held the pencils out to his wife and teased, "It's just me."

Genevieve gave a wry smile as she accepted the pencils and put them down where she had been working on sketches for another commission. She stood up a bit awkwardly because of her baby bump and wrapped her arms around his neck and Missy. She teased back, "And I would dance the hula if I could right now because it's you." She gave him a kiss and asked, "How was the case? Did you see Sophie?"

Reid nodded, "I did. She wasn't on point this time but she was lending a hand. I think the chief put her on the case because of Mike and she had worked with us before."

"All about making connections, Speedy. Like that profile thing you do," Genevieve replied as she went to the kitchen to make tea. "Connections with everything no matter how small." She gave a slight smile.

Reid chuckled a little at that. She liked to tease about being a profiler. It wasn't cruel or mocking but just... fun. She pointed out how his work could spill into other avenues of life. He teased her often enough about being a profiler when she painted or photographed. He replied, "Much like the uncertainty in the certainty."

"No cheating. Can't go to big brother."

"Where do you think I learned it?" Reid couldn't help but laugh at the mocking glare she was giving him. "Mike is the philosophical one."

"And that is cheating," Genevieve gave a warning finger while she continued to make their tea. "Besides, you have to come up with your lecture material on your own."

"Don't remind me," Reid replied as he looked down. He looked at her sketchbook and what she was trying to conceptualize. He frowned slightly, not paying attention to the fact that Missy was still sitting on his shoulder and purring. He studied the image and asked, "Is this for that commission you told me about?"

Genevieve came out with two mugs of tea. She handed one to Reid and looked at what he was looking at. "Yeah. It's for a visiting priest and it is supposed to be the fall of Lucifer."

Reid studied the sketch. She had drawn an almost serpentine look to Satan or Lucifer. He gave a slight sigh that didn't go missed by Genevieve. She looked at him and asked, "Something about it remind you of the case?"

"Yeah," Reid replied nodding.

That was the cue to go to the couch. It was the go to for deep discussions and also it was practical for a pregnant woman who had issues with swollen ankles and lower back aches. Reid held her mug while she got comfortable, adjusting the cushion behind her back before taking his seat. "Our unsub... she was kidnapping women and disfiguring them because of the rage she had against her mother and she had a liking for snakes."

Genevieve nodded, "I can see how my sketches would remind you of that."

"It's just... a lot of things lately have..." Reid paused a moment to try to find the right words. He looked at Genevieve, is gaze lingering on the baby bump. Finally, he said, "A lot of things have me thinking about... when the baby comes. What is going to happen, that kind of thing."

Genevieve studied Reid. He had been through a lot the past few months and then getting sprung with the fact that he was actually going to be a father after what he went through with Cat Adams... She admired that he was resilient to push through it. Of course, he had a lot of support from his friends and family. It was easy to forget that he had fears as much as the next person.

Reid looked at her to see if she was going to say something. When she didn't, he continued, "Mostly if I am going to be good at it and... I'm afraid that I'm going to mess it up." He looked at her with that wide plaintive look that begged for some answer.

"You're not going to mess it up, Speedy," Genevieve replied softly, "Not to the point where the baby will do something like become an unsub." She shook her head to indicate that it wasn't going to happen. "You're not going to be perfect and neither will I but I do know that you will be a good father."

"How do you know?"

It was not meant to be rhetorical. If anything, Reid asked the same question when he was trying to figure out if he was in love with her or not. Genevieve knew he was asking because that was how he learned and figured things out. She replied, "One, because you're a good man and... that's it." Seeing the look on his face, she smiled and leaned forward. She tapped his forehead, "You know the right thing up here and it's all well and good. But here..." She tapped his chest where his heart was. "Here is where it counts and that's why I know it's going to be okay."

Reid blinked as he looked at her finger where it lingered on his chest. He frowned when she moved her hand and tweaked his nose. Sighing in relief, he replied, "I had to say something, Gen. I mean... the unsub did body modification to herself because she had been made to feel worthless and that came from her mother."

"And your mother said you have a beautiful mind."

It was deliberate mentioning his mother and Reid knew that there was a point. He didn't have the greatest of childhoods either. Apart from the torment of bullies, his mother was schizophrenic and his father had left them. He grew up with the craziness and had to take care of his mother. It scared him about turning out like her. With Desi, the unsub, she had been emotionally abused and it festered into anger and she took it out on others to get her mother's attention.

"Speedy, you made the choice to not let it rule you."

Reid looked up and saw that Genevieve was looking at him intently. "I know," he whispered. He shrugged his shoulders slightly, "Still scares me that I'm going to be responsible for a being that is... fragile."

"Me too," she admitted. She smiled, "But I'm happy to face it with you."

Reid smiled as reached for her hand. He gave it a gentle squeeze. He knew that they would face the prospect of becoming parents together. He had other worries but he wasn't going to bother her with them since she was well aware of it and if he attempted to mother hen her too much, that would get her too excited. "Together, Gen."

"Always and forever."

Feeling better, Reid couldn't help but tease her, "So... about the angel in that sketch. He looks a little... funny."

Genevieve pulled a face at him but the teasing was a sign that he was feeling better. She replied with a slight pout, "I can't get the wings right. I have been literally looking at pictures of bird's wings all the time in between baby preparations and lessons. It's frustrating."

Reid sat back in a thoughtful mood, "I might know of something, but you might call it cheating."

"It's only cheating when it comes to philosophy, Speedy."

Reid grinned at her narrowed look. He knew she wasn't mad but she could get that way if he let it go too far. He petted Missy when she got off his shoulder to get to the back of the couch and curl up for a nap. Charlie jumped up and went to curl up in between them. This was getting good. He let out, "Well, I might have something that could help. Luckily, it's a picture since I doubt you'd be up for a strip tease."

Genevieve shot him a look, "What are you talking about?"

Reid gave a satisfied smile to let her figure it out. When she did, he accepted the half-hearted swipe. He said, "I'm not joking, Gen. I do have a picture. Actually, Mike gave it to me along with the rider that I would get one eventually."

"Get one what?"

"A tattoo."

"What?"

Reid took the opportunity to get up and go over to where he kept odds and ends and where he liked to read. He picked up a box and opened it, looking for what he wanted. He pulled it out and walked back to the couch and held it out to Genevieve. "See?"

Genevieve took the picture to examine it. Her eyes widened at it and looked at Reid, "Is this...?"

"Will it help?"

"Help? It's like they were real."

Reid watched as she got up. It was pretty fast considering her pregnancy. She raced to the table with the picture and started her sketching again, occasionally looking at the photo. It was the 'after' photo that had been taken when Michael got his tattoo on his back. He had given it to Reid saying that it would be a long time before anyone saw it again and to hold onto the 'proof.'

The tattoo was a pair of angel wings. It was designed to hide the scarring on Michael's back from his time as a prisoner in Afghanistan. The artist had designed it to move with the musculature of Michael's body. It really made him like his callsign. Reid knew that was why his wife was fascinated with it and, if she wanted, she would have asked Michael to strip and show her.

Thinking about it, Reid came to a few conclusions. Desi changed herself because she felt that she was ugly and a monster. Her mother told her that and she ended up making herself into that image. Michael, his best friend and brother, suffered trauma, enough to make anyone into a recluse, and yet he got his tattoo as a means to hide what had been done to him but also showing who he was. It seemed like a stark contrast between life and death and had Reid thinking about his lectures. Getting an idea, he grabbed his notes and went to make a few notations.

Experiences did shape how a person grow into who they were. But it also gave them a choice. They had the choice and they did what they did. He did what he did and he became an FBI agent with the BAU. And he stuck with it all these years through his choice and the support of his friends and family.

 _The most important thing in the world is family and love._ \- John Wooden

* * *

 **A/N:** Reid gets home from the case in Austin and has a chat with Genevieve about his thoughts from the case. Tag to Dust and Bones.


	9. 13-08 Neon Revelations

**Neon Revelations**

 _Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; riches take wings; the only earthly certainty is oblivion._ – Horace Greely

The night was cool as David Rossi poured a malt Scotch. He picked up his glass and absently when to where he kept his collection of cigars and selected one. He took a sniff to appreciate the smell and walked over to his favorite chair and sat down. He took a sip of the malt and looked out the window.

 _I know that look._

Rossi resisted jumping in his seat but still sighed heavily. "I wish you wouldn't do that. It's bad enough we have to look at unsubs that could be unpredictable." He leaned forward at the open laptop to look at the grinning face of Michael Nassar. "What are you doing calling me? Shouldn't you be talking to your wife and daughter?"

 _That is for Thanksgiving since the entire family will be there. I had time tonight and I had a feeling that tonight was the night to talk to David Rossi… And Penny Rose sent me the interview for your book. I saw the footage._

Rossi sighed, "And?"

 _How did it go?_

Rossi studied Michael's face. He learned enough about Reid's friend to know that while he wasn't a shrink, he was a great person to talk to and he had a knack of finding the right thing to say and it set you on the right path. He figured it was because he spent more time listening and observing people than talking but when he did… boy did it shine light. It had him wonder how Reid and Michael got along.

 _David, something happened?_

Rossi looked up at his name proper. "The case was as they usually are. People dying at the hands of an unsub…"

 _But there is something more._

It had been uttered in a matter of fact tone. Rossi had to marvel that Michael was one hell of a profiler and that was before he went to the FBI's training on profiling. The man did have a talent for picking up on things. It certainly produced a lot of laughs on how he was able to pick up a conversation while wearing noise canceling headphones.

Deciding that talking was better than nothing, Rossi, replied with a question, "What is it about people that has them react the way they do?"

 _What do you mean?_

"One of the victims, a reporter," Rossi frowned as he sat back in his chair. He twirled the cigar in fingers. He wasn't sure how to describe it since he was still trying to understand it. All his years as an agent and a profiler and there are still times that he was surprised by human behavior.

 _Oh. I think I see. This reporter was a victim and… they liked the thrill._

"Well at least you haven't changed in observation."

 _Well… you could say that I am guilty of that. A little._

"You?" Rossi frowned at the image in the screen.

 _Yeah. I mean before Kandahar. You know how the young are. They are excited about doing something new and get a little cocky and before you know it something like Kandahar happens._

"Hard to imagine you seeking danger for the thrill," Rossi posed. "I mean you are the first to stop one of us from rushing headlong when we apprehend a suspect and when there's no choice you turn into the guy that does the job you're doing over there. But not thrill seeking."

 _Like I said it was a little bit of a thrill seeking. In the end, for me, it was something that I was really good at especially when applying my Asperger's thing. The point is… I see where your thoughts are going. Why someone would find being a victim thrilling?_

"Exactly. I know you didn't have a good time of it."

 _More like I was pissed, I saw my men killed in front of me and all because I refused to give up information that I would be privy too because I was the team leader. Occasionally, I fall back into it and it ramps up the fact that I feel guilty that I survived._

"And you had normal reactions."

 _But what exactly is normal, David? What criteria determines normal?_

Rossi made a slight face at that. "Are you going philosophical on me?"

 _Just making a point. People… complicated, especially with emotional and thought processes. I mean look at me and Reid. Processing trauma… not exactly our strong suit._

Rossi had to admit that Michael had a point. "But still… our unsub became who he was because of a childhood trauma and he latched onto the fame saying that he was forgotten."

 _Well… in general, people are social beings. We aren't meant to be alone and we fear it enough and we can equate it with being forgotten. We all look for a connection and think about what we are leaving behind._

"You should've been a philosopher or a shrink than an army grunt," Rossi said after listening to Michael. He smiled when the man gave a good laugh at that assertion.

 _Look, David, this reporter… it is good that you worry. That means you haven't let this job jade you so much. Maybe that bout of retirement was a good thing._

"You really think so?"

 _Well, you still are surprised at what people can do even though you can claim that you've seen it all. The day that stops… then I would worry. As for the reporter… I pray he or she sees sense. Being a victim… I don't see it as a thrill and most people don't. How could they understand the trauma?_

"Exactly."

 _And I'm guessing they are basking in the fame it brings?_

"Yes."

 _Tough break. I'm guessing another experience wouldn't cut it. This person seems to want to live off the fame of telling the story. I'm guessing you're worried that this person would take more risks._

"That's usually case," Rossi replied as he took a sip of his malt. "I mean the usual doesn't cut it and they keep taking risks…" He shook his head at it.

 _And it would be better if they only hurt themselves but unfortunately there is someone that gets hurt. And disappointing that people get off on serial killers. The fascination with them._

"Glad someone agrees with me." Rossi took another sip of malt as he looked at nothing in particular.

 _Well if we go by society's definition of normal, we are more normal._

Rossi was in the middle of another sip when Michael said that. He snorted since it came out funny and he couldn't help but laugh. That was another talent of Michael's. He had the ability to make someone feel better by getting them to laugh or smile. "Thought you said it was relative."

 _That's philosophical, David. But a good thing to think about. Kind of helps sort our thoughts a little and find a measure of peace._

Rossi turned to look at the screen. He saw Michael looking back at him. The younger man looked exhausted but here he was taking time that could have been spent with his family talking to him. He sent emails regularly and they had video attachments that were allowed. If there was one thing he learned about Reid's friend was that he had a big heart that was attached to the quirks that came with being labeled a genius.

 _Feel better?_

Rossi smiled at Michael, "Yeah. Thanks kiddo."

 _Hey, we're family._

"Family?"

 _Blame Gen for that one. She calls us the BAU family and… I see it. Especially the way you guys looked after Spence after our official meeting. Especially you, David._

Rossi thought about it for a moment. "Why me?"

 _Words of wisdom. Older presence. Everyone has something that makes growing an interesting ride. My fellow captain and I… we relate. He's more intense than me but we respect each other and learn from each other._

"So you were promoted."

 _Have been for a while. I just like letting you think I'm still a lieutenant. The guys here do the same and I made it clear the team leader is the team leader. They are a good bunch of guys and I wouldn't have it any other way._

"So no problems?"

 _Only if you count being called the diva cause I fly out between here and there. Otherwise, no. I do what I do._

"That's good."

 _You don't need to tell Spence. We talked._

"Wasn't gonna say anything," Rossi counted mocking a defensive posture. He was grinning though. "It is more for my peace of mind."

 _Aww… didn't know you cared._

"I don't, but Emily and Garcia do," Rossi teased. He smiled, feeling better about the whole thing.

 _Ems doesn't care a bit and I am terrified of Penny Rose._

They shared a laugh at that since it was a bold faced lie. Michael had a sibling love for Penelope Garcia and vice versa even though it was laced with flirting and good humor. Emily Prentiss came to depend on Michael despite his outbursts, always being the steadying influence, even with the whole thing with Scratch. Rossi looked at the man looking back at him and said, "I'm glad you called."

 _Well… like I said, Penny sent me the footage and had a feeling about it._

"Well I'm not gonna argue about your intuition."

 _I'll get one of you some day. There is room for it and everything falls into place. I'm gonna miss being there with you guys on Thursday._

"After the dinner party, I offered to help with the cooking," Rossi replied, "Except it had to be at my place."

 _And how did Sarai take it._

"No comment."

They shared another laugh as the conversation drifted into more mundane things. Rossi found that he was less worried about that reporter and what she said. He wasn't going to try and understand it since it would just be bad for health, as Michael would put it. He looked at his cigar and lit it up as he continued his conversation with Michael, each sharing a laugh and it made the night seem a lot better. It made Rossi glad that he hadn't let the job get him down too much and he wasn't going to let this drag him down. Not when he had friends and family.

 _I'm not jaded yet. I'm still at the point where, if someone comes up to me with great energy, I'm happy to meet them._ – David Walton

* * *

 **A/N:** Rossi is still thinking about that reporter and what she said about it being a thrill to be a victim when an unexpected phone call from a friend sets him at ease. Tag to Neon Terror. Enjoy.


	10. 13-09 Lost Flag

**Lost Flag**

 _If you want to be a real human being- a real woman, a real man- you cannot tolerate things which put you to indignation, to outrage. You must stand up. I always say to people, 'Look around; look at what makes you unhappy, what makes you furious, and then engage yourself in some action.'_ — Stephane Hessel

Tara Lewis considered herself a pretty calm person. She was a psychologist and trained to handle clinical psychopaths and the like. She did her job with the BAU and did it well. But like most people, she did have her limits and when it happened, she tried to minimize the collateral damage that could occur with outbursts of anger such as the one that one of the conspiracy theorists or truther did by calling the shooting at Sandy Hook a setup.

Tara had been at Sandy Hook and she had to help parents and loved ones who lost children in that shooting. The sight shook her to the core. To hear it belittled like she did, it just made her angry; it touched a nerve to the point where she had to excuse herself and just let out all her frustrations. It frustrated her since she had never really lost her cool like that. At least not in front of the team. And she wasn't one to nearly get themselves fired for having strong beliefs.

 _I did what I did because I really believe in Spence. And call it a big brother complex or hero complex or whatever you psychologists call it._

Tara remembered that conversation when Reid was first arrested for murder. She had met his friend Michael Nassar previously and had developed a good opinion about him. Like all relationships though it was a journey that was full of surprises, with some being more memorable than others because it brought the best out of the team.

As she cooled down, Tara wondered how Michael would approach these truthers. He was not big on conspiracy and said that conspiracies were fanciful tales that people invented because the simplest explanation is not enough. She had said the same thing to the only truther that was talking to them. It was one of those things that had her interested in Michael as a person. He was big on scientific fact but he wasn't afraid to show that he believed in things he couldn't see like God and didn't care what other people thought about it. Reid merely shrugged at it and said, "It's Mike."

That was the explanation for something that was just odd. It would be funny if it became code for anything that was out of the ordinary. Tara witnessed it enough before Michael's current deployment and encouraged her to actually interview him. Or at least attempt to do it.

 _I don't know what good it will do since I probably fit psychological types you know and it may be the Asperger's but… I'll talk._

He humored her when she asked questions and she did realize that he wasn't kidding about the Asperger's. Reid confirmed it and it explained a few things but not everything. Thinking about it, Reid's friend kind of prepared her for this. True it wasn't the same but it was a good reminder that people weren't the kind to be in cookie cutter form. And given the way he answered her questions prepared her to go back in though the lingering thought of what it would be like if her were talking to a truther was a constant and no doubt the team was probably thinking the same thing.

It was a gamble to reveal the profile to the local truthers but she was right in that it would give the look of transparency. In the end, they had them all in holding because of the suicide of one of the truthers and they were using it to find out what was really going on. It was a challenging puzzle and Tara could almost hear the grin in Michael's voice calling it a puzzle and she could hear his voice prompting her to think about it and look at the case from a different angle.

In the end it was something simple with the death of one of the victims, an Occam's razor example. The simplest explanation is usually the right one and in the case of the whole thing with the fish tank, it turned out that bleach touching a certain type of coral produced toxic fumes that knocked the victim out and he ended up drowning. It was more likely a disappointment to the truthers since it was overly simple and they were completely convinced that the FBI framed people.

In the end Carl Lee was the true victim of the unsub and it turned out to be one of the oldest motives in the book and it revolved around infidelity. At one point, when Tara was trying to work out her theory, she realized that she was starting to sound like the truthers and it was evident on the team's faces. It was a smack to the back of the head to get things reoriented but she could hear Michael chuckling because he would be genuinely amused by it and would entertain the theory and let you try to convince him that you were right.

The team did manage to get their suspect and the evidence needed for the DA to prosecute the case. How would have known that the unsub was a psychopath? In the end Tara felt good about it. She filed it away mentally for her face time with Michael. The man made it a point to talk to everyone on the team whether it was Skype or email. The team learned a long time ago never to ask him why he was talking to them when he should be talking to his family. It was always the same so no one argued and he did manage to have some advice or words of encouragement. She remembered when he came on at Thanksgiving and he said hello to everyone.

 _Wishing I was there with you guys but… it's good seeing all of you together. Carries with you._

Tara wondered what the man was doing now. She did know that if he were on the plane, they would be talking about the case. More likely he would end up joking that he was a normal crazy compared to the conspiracy theorists or something like that. Then it would end with him and Reid doing whatever it was they were working on. She didn't know what but Tara was convinced of was that putting two geniuses together was waiting for something unexpected to happen. She watched them play chess and was amazed how they would declare beating the other in a certain amount of moves.

Thinking about it definitely made the trip home smoother. She and Emily talked about what happened with her outburst. Sure they talked there but she was able to talk about it more without the pressure of the case hanging over their heads. In the end it reminded the team that they were people too and that they needed to wind down. Certainly their six week hiatus after Scratch was welcome and necessary. The mood was good to carry through on the way back to the office. In fact, the whole team was in a good mood. They certainly didn't expect to see what waited for them in the bullpen.

Tara sensed something was wrong when she and the others saw Reid standing in the bullpen, leaning on Michael's desk with his hands in his pockets. It was a casual position but she could tell something was up. It was confirmed when she spotted Garcia almost hiding behind him and that was a feat considering her bubbly nature made her visible.

"What are you doing here, kiddo?" Rossi asked with a slight frown. "Thought you'd be home by now."

"Teaching getting to be too much?" Alvez couldn't help but tease with a grin.

Tara felt the shock and feeling she felt at Sandy Hook creep up her spine when Reid looked at them. Garcia had a similar look. Something was definitely wrong and the rest of the team was starting to feel it as Reid looked at them and started, "It's Mike. He's… he's MIA."

 _We never understand how little we need in this world until we know the loss of it._ —James M. Barrie

* * *

 **A/N:** Tara seemed to be affected by the last case and while it was solved, grave news awaits the team at home. Tag to False Flag.


	11. 13-10 Re-Emerging

**Re-Emerging**

 _Most people exist in very clouded states of mind. It's sort of like when you're underwater in a big swimming pool and you open your eyes, and you can't see very far and everything's distorted. – Frederick Lenz_

Emily was right about one thing. With his thirty day break from the field, Spencer Reid was not put in moth balls. Rather, he was kept busy. He had the lectures he gave to the recruits at the academy. There was his wife who was in her last trimester of her pregnancy and at some points it drove him crazy since her natural inclination to be kooky at times was amplified; like she had a logical insanity about her and some of her best works came out of it. Then there was looking after Sarai and his goddaughter Aurora.

It had been a tough time because his best friend and brother, Michael had been MIA for over three weeks. Sarai refused to believe he was dead until the chaplain came with the writ in his hand. Aurora was sad missing her father and not completely understanding what was going on. It hade Reid realize how Michael's presence and the knowledge he was alive and well provided a calm and steady feel to everything. He noticed it at the BAU when he spoke to the team and Garcia had a little cloud hanging over her shoulder even though she gave the impression of being cheerful and bubbly.

It got better when the best Christmas present arrived. Michael came home and it was worthy of one of those Hallmark Christmas movies. It also had Reid smirk since it was a bit funny and like the pranks they played on each other. Reid knew that the team would be in for a surprise when they walked in when his thirty day leave was over. He knew Michael well but he could tell that there was something different about his brother.

It was barely noticeable. Michael kept up the happiness with his wife and daughter and even joked saying that he asked his little brother to look after them, not move it. There was levity but Reid could sense that there was something on his brother's mind and it had to do with the mission he came back from. From what Reid could tell, it didn't seem horrible since his brother was thoughtful most of the time, like he was coming up with one of his elaborate plans.

Eventually his brother talked to him about what happened. How the mission went sideways with his team getting ambushed and the team leader getting seriously injured. Michael took command and they sought refuge in the nearby village since the Taliban outnumbered them. In the end they set an ambush and the village was destroyed but Michael was left behind with another villager. Together they trekked through the south to the FOB. It was worthy of storytelling if it weren't for the fact that it was a fight for survival.

The story had Reid thinking his time in prison wasn't too bad but Michael wouldn't have any of that. He did find out that Michael met one of the girls from the school Sarai had taught in along with her missionary doctor work. Reid heard the painful tone Michael had when he mentioned that the girl had been one of the ones that had been raped by the enemy. There was also relief that she had been lucky to find a husband that accepted her despite that.

 _It's refreshing to see something good come from a place that traditionally disregards part of the human race._

Reid couldn't help but smirk at how Michael chose his words. He looked at his paperwork that he was working on. He glanced over to see Michael sitting at his old desk looking like he was relaxing. He would have chuckled when he heard his phone ring. Looking at the caller ID, he saw that it was Rossi and answered, "Rossi?"

Reid listened to what Rossi was asking about one of the bodies they got that was drowned in a sack with a needle through the nose. That sounded familiar as he wrote down the details, unaware that Michael had gotten up and was listening to the conversation. Well, the one side that he could hear. Reid never doubted Michael's ability to listen to one side of the conversation and then managed to piece together all the details.

It wasn't until Reid felt a tap on his upper arm that he realized Michael had been working on what he was just writing down. He saw the slip of paper Michael held between his fingers. He took it silently and looked at it and gave Michael a raised brow. He turned back to his conversation and read the results to Rossi.

When he was done, Reid turned to see Michael was sitting in his chair looking relaxed. One could mistake him for taking a nap. He ventured, "Since when did you become an expert on the ocean?"

Michael smirked even though his eyes were closed, "You forget I studied cultures, little brother."

"And do I even want to guess how you managed to know what Rossi was asking about?"

"You know me, Spence," Michael replied as he opened one eye and looked at Reid. He leaned back in his chair. "It's like physics magic. But also like what I tell my daughter; that I see numbers such but I hear it put all together as music." He smiled and hummed to himself as he leaned back. "Bright colors and notes."

Reid couldn't help but smile at that. It was the same thing essentially when Michael explained it on rainy day at Caltech. He nodded, "Right. But you really shouldn't be here. It's not like you were cleared to work here."

"I still have my badge."

Reid made a face and a funny sound at that, until he noticed something. "You aren't even wearing it."

"I still got a few tricks up my sleeve," Michael smirked. His eyes were still closed as he smirked. He leaned back in his chair. "And that receptionist was rather sweet."

Reid couldn't help but chuckle. "Seems like you're feeling better."

"I have been fine," Michael replied. He stretched while maintaining balance in his chair. "I know you and Sarai think I'm not alright, but I am. Just being able to come back and be father, brother, colleague… it's like emerging from underwater. It's the same every time I come home. I feel more alive."

"Ever thought about… quitting?"

Michael opened his eyes and looked at Reid. "Countless times. I even wanted to the day my friend and fellow captain was injured on our last mission. I have since I was a POW." He looked at Reid for a moment with a piercing glance. "But in the end I choose not to."

"You know why?"

"Why are you still with the FBI?"

Reid paused a moment. It was annoying to have a question being answered with a question. Yet with Michael there was always a purpose to it. He nodded and replied, "You still feel that you have a job to do."

"More like being called to it," Michael replied with a slight smile that was almost wry. "I believe it is God's purpose for me. But also I can't look at Rory without thinking about those girls and many others. So I guess you could say that I am an idealist in trying to bring opportunity to those that were previously denied it. Protect those that are unable to." Michael shrugged and leaned back in his chair. "Not really the thing you would hear from a genius, huh?"

"Not really," Reid replied honestly, "But it's you."

Michael shrugged and leaned back in his chair. "Like I said, it's like emerging from underwater. War dulls things but when you are certain and have something you want to protect and it's worth it… you see the end of the tunnel."

Reid nodded and sat back down to finish his paperwork. He did have a lecture later that day. He left Michael to his own devices as he scribbled notes.

"So how's Gen?"

Reid couldn't help but laugh at the change in subject. Looking at Michael, he saw his brother smiling at him. He was right. When he was gone, it felt like he was underwater. Now that his brother was back, it was like he re-emerged. Life was getting back on track and Reid could see it as Garcia came and offered coffee carrying on with the flirty banter she used on Michael and the man dished it back. He smiled as he turned to finish his notes.

 _Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish._ – John Quincy Adams

* * *

 **A/N:** Reid is ready to get back in the field and there is a surprise waiting for the team. He also sees another side of his best friend and brother. Tag to Submerged.


	12. 13-11 Tilt Down Reunion

**Tilt Down Reunion**

 _A story to me means a plot where there is some surprise. Because that is how life is- full of surprises._ – Isaac Bashevis Singer

Penelope Garcia was in two minds about surprises. The good kind was when a friend surprised you by giving a present for no reason than being a friend. The bad kind was like when she was shot. The guy she thought was the one ended up shooting her because she flagged cases that he played a role in. The surprise she got though was definitely the former.

She had made arrangements for her "Missed Holiday Meals", or as she called it, "MHM." She invited the entire team, well at least that which was there. She had tried to get through the holidays, doing her job but it was hard when you knew that a friend was lost in the course of his job and you didn't know if they were alive or not. She missed her tall, dark and handsome that looked after the team like a fierce guardian angel and was like an older brother to her.

Reid had been the one to tell everyone that Michael was missing and at first she didn't want to believe it. But he showed her the notice and it was there black and white. It had her almost hyperventilate mostly because she had a bad feeling about this deployment. Michael had left without really saying goodbye, but then again it was more like a see you later with him. She spent her free time going over to see Sarai and little Aurora. As far as she could tell, they were never alone and Sarai appreciated it all the same. It kept things going.

Garcia though kept pestering Reid for news but on the down low. She didn't want to get anyone's hopes up by asking and she knew Reid was the only one that could get the details if he really wanted them. For the most part he didn't, but in this case, he had been in the same mindset. He had been somber but managed to be cheerful when he was on his sabbatical especially for his wife but lately, he seemed to perk up a little. Probably because he was due to come back to work. Garcia wasn't going to think about it too much since this was supposed to be a happy time for the team. And they needed it after this latest case.

It was a shocker to find that a small town had drug use stats on par with the national average. You would think that they would be used to it but Garcia would never be used to it. It was icky and dark and that was why she surrounded herself with colors. It was to alleviate the ugliness she saw every day and why she dressed like she did. It wasn't her personality, it was to give a sense of normalcy and something that wasn't bad. This was one of those things and to just be with the people that mattered the most to her.

Everything was all planned out and everyone was there for her MHM dinner. Everyone, including Reid was there and they were all smiling, making up for the doom and gloom over the holidays and just the joy of being together. Then, that was when it happened.

The knock on the door was not even heard. It took almost a pounding and a ringing of the doorbell for anyone to realize that someone was at the door. Everyone looked at Garcia since this was her dinner. She was surprised herself since she wasn't expecting anyone. She had extended the offer to Sarai and Aurora but Sarai declined, stating that she and Genevieve had planned a few things, one included the annual charity ball for the hospital she worked at. So it had her surprised that someone was there.

It felt awkward being watched as she went to the door and asked who it was, "Yes?"

"Love planted a rose, and the world turned sweet."

Garcia knew who it was but she couldn't believe it. She had the door opened but no sound came out. Her jaw fell open as Michael said with that lopsided smile of his, "Hey, there Penny Rose."

That did it and Garcia couldn't help but squeal in happiness and surprise. The next thing she knew, she had leapt forward and grabbed Michael around the neck and hugged him, probably close to choking him to death.

"Good to see you too, Penny," Michael got out as he held onto the little woman. He chuckled as he returned the hug.

"Oh my god, you're here!" Garcia released Michael's next and was rubbing his shoulders. She then frowned slightly, "It is you right?"

Michael laughed, "It's me."

He would have said more but the rest of the team had gotten up to find out what the noise was. He spotted then and then gave an almost sheepish wave, "Hey guys."

That broke the damn and everyone came forward, all vying for a hug. It became a round robin of hugs from everyone. Everyone moved forward except for Reid who was standing back and giving a slight smile while holding his hands in his trouser pockets. It wasn't really noticed since all focus was on the fact that Michael was back and was alive and well. It was not until that people were well underway and chattering about various things that Garcia asked, "So… how long were you and Reid keeping this a secret?"

Michael looked at Garcia as she gave him a look and picked up his glass of wine. He replied, "Since Christmas."

Garcia pouted and would have punched Michael but didn't. She did managed to get out, "You did not."

"Gotta have a little fun and was busy getting things squared away."

"And you couldn't let me know? How could you not let me know?"

Michael looked at Garcia as he fingered the stem of his wine glass. He looked at other members of the team as they chattered away with smiles on their faces. He looked back at Garcia and replied, "I was busy getting things squared away so I could come back to work." He gave a gentle smile, "And I know how you like surprises."

"I like surprises but to know whether or not my tall, dark and handsome is alive and well… that is something I'd rather know right away."

"Like I said, I like to have my fun, Penny Rose. And there were some things I had to do before letting you guys know I was officially back on the map. Nature of the job."

"Well at least you got to see your wife and that darling little princess of yours."

"She's still my whirlwind, but I appreciate the sentiment all the same. And don't blame Spence. I told him not to say anything because there wasn't a guarantee that I would be allowed to come back to the BAU."

"So you could have not been coming back at all?"

"Nature of my job with DIA," Michael replied as he lifted his glass to take a sip. "And things have been picking up in Afghan that they might need my services. Though I'm glad to say that it is not the case for me to deploy. So I've got a job for the next few months or so."

Garcia smiled and grabbed his hand and squeezed, "Well I'm glad that you're back and alive. We all missed you."

"We all did," Rossi's voice cut in.

Michael looked up to see everyone looking at him. He nodded in agreement as he looked at them. He had missed them even when his focus was on the job. His operator teammates joked and teased him about the pictures he carried on their outings. Prominent was his picture of wife and daughter. The others were various pictures with members of the team. The one with him and Garcia had him growl at anyone who suggested they were an item. He carried his family with him and when he had been trekking the desert had been his source of determination to get back.

"Glad you're back, Mike," Emily cut in.

"And looking forward to having me tackle that paperwork I guess," Michael teased.

Everyone chuckled at that as Emily replied, "You got that right."

Michael sat back and looked at everyone. His fingers wrapped around the glass stem of his glass. He smiled at everyone and said, "I'm glad to be back, guys. And as clichéd as it sounds, there is no place like home. To family." He lifted his glass.

Everyone raised their glasses in a toast. Garcia looked on as everyone smiled and continued to chatter. Last year ended on a low note with Michael missing. The New Year seemed to be full of promise with him returning to the team. True that they had the job of tracking serial killers but they would do the job together as a family.

 _Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year._ – Ralph Waldo Emerson

* * *

 **A/N:** A proper reintroduction of Mike to the BAU family. Garcia is certainly excited. Tag to Tilt-Down Boogie. Enjoy.


	13. 13-12 Hunter's Moon Rise

**Hunter's Moon Rise**

 _There is an energy that you carry when you're nurturing another life where you're protecting first- and once you know that cub is out of the wa of the hunter's gun, you can be a little more daring._ – Tori Amos

The night was pretty nice even after all that happened on the case. It was enough to put Michael in a thoughtful mood. Well, he had been in one ever since he got back from Afghanistan and his latest op. It wasn't enough to affect how he worked with others but he knew well enough that he needed to complete a few things before they called him back to his ODA team, which he did and continued to do while he was working with the BAU.

He only had to check in with his superior since the reports were sent directly to him and those were lengthy conversations over the video chat. They helped but it still kept him in a thoughtful position to the point that it had the team asking him at various points if he was okay. He did notice that he grew more focused when they staked out Central Park for their 'werewolf'.

Emily had reservations about him going out there alone to help find their unsub. Her concern was that he could be attacked. He understood that but he had the feeling that he would be okay. Hardly reassuring and not standard procedure but she allowed it. It showed how much she trusted him to do the job and he had no intention of letting her down with that.

In the end, he got close, very close and was able to convince the unsub to let the kid go. He actually didn't have his weapon out, which had Emily upset at him for that but… in the end the case was solved. He knew though that the end didn't always justify the means. It was why he was outside Emily's office, late at night, after everyone had left. He knocked on the door.

"Come in, Mike."

Michael gave a slight smile as he opened the door and joked gently, "Got a sixth sense I don't know about Ems?"

Emily Prentiss looked at Michael as he walked in. She gave a slight smile in reply, "You have a way of knocking on doors that is consistent with everything else you do. You knock like a gentleman."

Michael chuckled at that, "Southern mannerisms. It's what got me my wife."

"I'll bet." Emily watched as he came to stand in front of her desk. At least he didn't stand at attention like he did with Hotchner. The at ease was better but it still held his military training and in a way she appreciated it even though she already had his respect before she was put in charge of the BAU. She had come to depend on him for things that people took for granted; he was a steadying presence and had a way of suggesting solutions while everyone else was tense about a case. It had been hard to swallow when he had been MIA and seen how hard it hit Reid. It made her and the team happy when Michael showed up after weeks of no news.

Looking at Michael she offered, "Have a seat, Mike. What's up?"

Michael took the proffered seat and pulled up so he could face Emily. He replied, "Just… been thinking. A lot."

"I'll say. I think I've caught you staring off in thought half a dozen times during the case." Emily folded her hands on top of her desk. "I didn't want to say anything since your mind was on the case. Though I really wasn't too happy about how it went down."

"Yeah. Figured that." Michael cleared his throat and looked down at his lap. "And I figured that we should talk about it."

"Alright," Emily nodded. "What's going on Mike? I have the reports from the shrink, the assessments over the past few days… You're rock solid according to them. This last thing… it makes it look like you were reckless, the kind of thing that the brass want to avoid with Reid."

Michael thought about it for a bit before replying, "I know but… I didn't see it that way."

Emily watch Michael. She knew he had something to say and while she didn't doubt that he told Reid everything since they were like brothers, he talked to other members of the team when he needed it. She waited patiently for him to continue and was rewarded.

Michael appreciated Emily's patience with him as he found the means to tell her, "I know that people want to know about Afghanistan and have every right to think that it is connected and it is." He looked at Emily and continued, "It was as the report says. My team and I were sent on a mission. We were ambushed and the team leader, my friend and fellow captain, was injured seriously. Unfortunately, we couldn't call for exfil. Heavy Taliban activity but there was a village nearby. We took a risk and headed towards it and we were lucky that it was friendly."

"I'll say," Emily interrupted.

"Yeah. And one of the villagers was one of the girls I had rescued… well she claims I rescued her when I was a POW."

"And how did you feel seeing her again?"

It was a basic question but one that filled in gaps. Emily wanted to know what happened but she was also aware that it was up to him to talk. Right now he was talking. She was only prompting to see if she could keep him talking.

Michael smiled slightly at her. He knew interrogation and could tell when it was happening. His choice to respond was a testament to his trust in the team. He replied, "I was… surprised. I didn't think I would see her again since last I heard the missionary team had relocated the girls and that was the end of the story, even with Sarai keeping tabs. But it wasn't surprise, it was… relief and happiness." He gave a pointed look at Emily and added, "She was raped by them and for her to find a husband after that… I gave praise and thanks for the man that took her as a wife."

"So you were happy then."

"Yes, but it was short lived."

"How so?"

Michael had been studying his wedding band. He twisted the metal around his finger studying the design and the engraving. He took a breath and continued, "Taliban found us and were converging on the village. The only way out was to create an explosion." He shook his head and looked at nothing in particular.

"You set off an explosion?"

"I had permission. Believe me, I tried thinking of other ways but that was the only thing." He looked at Emily and said, "I destroyed people's homes to give them time to escape to a neighboring village and for my team to be ex-filled. I stayed behind to do it since the remote detonator was disabled."

Emily sat in her seat as Michael stared at her. She could see the hints of emotion in his eyes even though his posture said elsewise. "You stayed behind so others could escape. It's you, Mike."

"Maybe," Michael acknowledged, "I mean, I know what I did when Spence was in trouble and I overreacted and nearly got myself fired. That was reckless. What I did in Afghan… calculated down to the last possible scenario in rapid fire calculation. The precise reason why I'm in the position I'm in with DIA. And it destroyed people's homes."

"I can see why that would bother you."

"But they were grateful." Michael frowned a little at that. He couldn't understand it. "I mean they moved in with family and started over again… the same thing they've been doing long before we came in." He shook his head at that.

Emily watched the puzzled look. She always thought that Michael was the more emotional mature one compared to Reid. He took things in a stride that would require therapy in some cases. This seemed to really have shaken him up. "Well it explains why you have bene thoughtful."

"More thoughtful in how I approach things. I still rapid fire calculations…"

"But you're more cautious." Emily leaned forward and continued, "And that's admirable Mike but in this job, you can't be too cautious. You know better than anyone that in the field you sometimes have to make split decisions and you do it with the information you have at hand. I mean, not everyone can rapid fire scenarios like you can. Reid maybe… but not everyone." She gave a reassuring smile.

"I know," Michael replied. "It's why I kept my mind on the job."

"And I'm glad it worked out as it did despite the body count."

"I didn't go in with a weapon because I saw that he wouldn't hurt the kid and a small part of me understood him." Michael frowned a little at that. At the look Emily was giving him, he explained, "I stayed behind and the son of the elder did with me even though I told them all to leave. He helped me out and we were stranded in the middle of nowhere.'

"And you didn't have a radio or anything?"

"Com was busted… because I played amateur electrician," Michael replied while operating a sheepish grin. He looked down a little and his lip twitched slightly. "Anyway, we were stuck and nowhere to go. I told him to head to where his father was heading and that I would head back to base. He went with me and…"

"You looked out for him."

"Made sure he didn't get dehydrated… protected him." Emily studied Michael intently. "It's why you approached the unsub like you did."

"I won't ever compromise a case, Ems. If it starts… I will say something and if not… I trust you to pull me even if I protest." Michael looked at Emily. He leaned forward in his seat and clasped his hands together, resting his forearms on his knees. "I just thought you should know."

Emily digested what he was telling her and nodded, "Thank you for telling me."

"Thought you should know. Ems…" Michael adjusted his seat as he paused. "I'm not being reckless but I see what you mean. I read somewhere that we are the sum of all our experiences. This was just a turning point. We all have them. I thought about it a lot when I was trekking those weeks back to base and… I know I can do the job you guys can do and understand it. I learned a bit when working with IRT. I just… trying to make it work for me."

"I think you already have," Emily countered. "I mean, you've seen things on par with us and then some. You've been through traumatic things and did well in recovery. You're just changing perspective and it's a good thing. But don't change to the point that you're not comfortable with it." She gave a slight smile and added, "I know about the whole Asperger's thing and have a liking for order to the point that it's a stabilizing thing for you to function."

"Yeah."

"You're good Mike and I appreciate you taking time to talk with me."

Michael looked at Emily, "I owe you that much, Ems."

"We're on the same team here."

Michael gave a nod and a smile. They chatted some more until Emily got up to leave. Michael took the time to help her close up. "Let me walk you out."

"Still acting like a gentleman."

"Southern manners."

Emily smiled and let Michael accompany her. She chuckled at the casual way he stood with his hands in his pants pockets, his blazer hanging casually. He looked like those male models in the magazines. The chuckle was loud enough to catch the attention of Michael.

"What's so funny, Ems?"

"Nothing," Emily replied, "Just that you really missed your calling."

"As what?"

"A model."

The bark of laughter was a good sign. Emily looked at Michael as he laughed at her assertion. It wasn't ridiculous but he thought it funny and joked, "I may have caught the attention of girls at Caltech but nowhere that striking."

It was a joke but Emily knew better. She hadn't failed to see how women would look at him when on a case or in general. Of course she knew he had eyes only for his wife. He would never sway from Sarai. "Of course," she gave in mock seriousness, "Cause you are just plain ugly."

"Sure as shooting."

They laughed as they continued to head down to where their vehicles were parked. Michael knew that it would take time but he would find the middle ground he once operated on. He had time. It was why his superior agreed to him staying stateside for some time. He knew the conditions and Emily would have them if not now, in a couple of days. He would work through this and maybe learn a little bit more about being human.

 _You've got to express yourself in life, and it's better out than in. What you reveal, you heal._ – Chris Martin

* * *

 **A/N:** Mike talks to Emily after the case and reveals what happened when he was MIA. Tag to Bad Moon on the Rise.


	14. 13-13 Placebo Cure

**Placebo Cure**

 _What humanity needs today is not merely philosophy or theology, but a message or reassurance_. – Dada Vaswani

"You doing okay?"

JJ stared out the window of the car, looking at people, buildings, other vehicles, but not really taking it in. She was still trying to process what had just happened. All this time she had been panicking and it was not what she was expecting.

"JJ."

JJ turned at her name and caught Michael looking at her with concern in his eyes though his expression looked almost emotionless. If that was his state of being shocked then she had a ways to go before knowing him like she knew Reid. She blinked when he repeated his question, "You doing okay?"

Was she okay? She wasn't really sure. After what was 'discussed', she wasn't even sure what that was.

It all started with the email she received from Assistant Director Barnes. It came right when they were thrust onto another case locally and put her in a state throughout the case. She didn't know much about Barnes and it worried her since the last time she got a similar email, she had been moved out of the BAU and went to work for DOD and that ended up with her time in Afghanistan. The nice thing was that she wasn't alone in that.

The team had their own unique expressions and what often set her laughing was the fact that Michael, Reid's friend and brother, didn't swear. She had never heard the man curse whether it was in frustration or being excited over something that would help a case. No F-bombs or anything like that. He would utter peculiar phrases and usually had people looking twice and trying hard not to laugh. She learned enough to know when he was upset and he was upset that day.

 _That scheming shrew!_

JJ had to ask what he was upset about as they were heading down to their assignments. He silently showed her his cell phone with the email addressed to him and it was from Barnes. She looked up at him in shock since he essentially insulted her and there was the distinct possibility it would get back to her and then he would be in trouble. It also had her puzzled since the only reasons she could think of that Barnes would call him in was she found out they had worked together in Afghanistan or she managed to make it so he couldn't work with the FBI anymore.

She hadn't asked Michael about his feelings and focused on the case and when time allowed, thought about the email and its meaning. She ended up asking Simmons about Barnes and he profiled the woman. She frowned in confusion at Michael's outburst until Simmons said, "I take it Mike didn't take his summons well."

That had JJ look at Simmons and ask, "How do you know that?"

"The fact that he said 'scheming shrew' a couple of times…" Simmons shrugged slightly. "It did not go well when Barnes contrived to have IRT dismantled. Mike saw through her game and refused to play it no matter what Garrett said."

"Then why would Barnes call him in?"

"If she's consolidating power, she's trying to make life miserable and maybe kick him out. She never liked him and considered the liaison position to be excess." Simmons didn't look at JJ but focused on the road. "Two years for everyone to warm up to him."

"Two years?"

"They weren't used to the quirks and having Reid's twin around." Simmons gave as slight smile at that. "The headphones got them the worst."

"Yeah well, still can't figure out how he can keep up if he's not listening," JJ let out a slight chuckle more for relief but was barely feeling it. She looked ahead, feeling worried.

"Knowing Mike, he'll manage to say what he thinks and Barnes will be the one confused."

It was enough to lighten the mood and put JJ back into focus on the job. She and Simmons managed to catch up with the car of their unsub. They knew who it was but in the end, they weren't able to save the last victim. That was always hard. You tried so hard to stop the body count and the unsub gets just one more. The upside was that Michael managed to make her smile with a comment that included 'scheming shrew' much to Emily's consternation. It helped as they made their way up to Barnes' office and JJ saw just how much animosity was between Michael and Barnes.

"Captain Nassar, good to see you," had been uttered in clipped tones and the look was hardly welcoming.

"Hello Assistant Director Barnes. It has been awhile."

JJ could have sworn the ad joiner 'not long enough' had been added by both of them. Unfortunately it set the tone for the bombshell Barnes dropped on her. Even after the 'talk' in the office, she still was in shock of the whole thing. It was enough to have Michael drive her home, insisting out of concern for her state. It was where she was at now, staring at him blankly and getting nothing but that warm gentleness that had her boys declare him to be the best uncle next to Uncle Spence.

Michael glanced at JJ, concerned about her state of mind and worried. He considered JJ to be the most reasonable and like a rock in most cases even when the emotional threatened. To see her like this… It had his rapid fire calculations going beyond comprehension. "JJ, talk to me. Please."

JJ shook her head and apologized, "Sorry. I just…" She frowned slightly before continuing, "I'm just shocked."

"Putting it mildly."

"I can't fathom for the life of me why she's removing Emily," JJ frowned as she talked out her thoughts. "I mean as far as everything, I get the whole thing with Scratch but since then…"

"Simmons would have told you the shrew is a scheming, power hungry woman," Michael replied as he made a turn. He pursed his lips, keeping his eyes on the road. "It's more to show that she can do something and she feels threatened. Ems is leadership material and probably better at it than Barnes. I've seen it before."

"Army?"

"Pretty much."

"Involving you?"

"Once."

JJ knew that the short answers held deeper meaning but she sensed he was livid about the whole thing. She could tell he saw it as a threat to Emily and the team at large and while he understood structural changes were needed, she sensed this was personal and maybe it was. She had to ask, "How did that turn out?"

"Beaten up and ended up with bruised kidneys that turned into a renal tear."

"Seriously?" JJ couldn't help but ask and her eyes widened in surprise.

"Sure as shooting," he replied softly. He looked ahead and then sighed softly. "I am livid at this move because I know Barnes and she really doesn't like me. I don't play games like hers and it makes her upset because I won't bend on it."

"But she basically has you in charge with me."

"More like a stab in the eye." He glanced at JJ and added, "But I won't take it out on people that don't deserve it."

"I don't doubt that."

"JJ… This is going to be hard on everyone."

"Yeah. I know."

"I don't like it and to be honest I don't have a good feeling about it. Minus all the extra stuff."

JJ didn't like the situation either. "I don't like it either. Mike, hands are tied in this."

"Not all hands." Michael glanced at JJ and gave a lopsided grin. "If it were so, Barnes would have me shipped out. As it stands she can do anything she wants with me just short of actually firing me." At her look he chuckled, "Don't worry. I don't do that kind of thing but I know the brass and I do know the terms of my stay here."

JJ looked at him and noticed a peculiar look. She frowned, "You're planning something."

"Rapid fire calculations of probables," he corrected with a wry grin.

JJ was not confident at that. She knew what it meant and having witnessed him and Reid prank each other… "Just… don't do anything that will look bad."

"It's bad all around," he countered softly, "But I won't do anything to hurt the team. You know me." He paused a bit and then sighed, "In all honesty, you could call it recon aka getting dirt on Barnes. As to use… I'm not like that but it will give me a better idea of what I'm dealing with."

JJ nodded and looked at her lap. It was silent the rest of the way home when Michael pulled her car up in front of her house. She continued to sit there as he killed the engine. Taking a couple of breaths, she finally mustered up what she wanted to say. Looking downward she said, "Mike, I need you to be a right hand. Like you are for Emily. I need you to be that otherwise… I don't think I can do this." She turned to look at him.

Michael blinked as he studied her. His expression appeared solemn and a little disconcerting to people who weren't used to it. Finally he said, "You can do this, JJ. I know you and you aren't the kind to trample over people to move up. I know you didn't want to leave the BAU when you were called by DOD. You came back and moved up to being a profiler instead of returning to be a communications liaison. Your colleagues and teammates respect you. You won't screw this up."

"Please, Mike. I just need someone there that makes it feel normal." JJ didn't look at him but she felt the emotions piling up the moment he started laying out his case. "That I can count on and…"

"Be a punching bag?"

JJ looked up sharply to see Michael giving a gentle smile that said he was teasing but he understood what she wanted. "I'll punch you right now if you want and then you'd have to explain to Sarai why you have a fat lip."

"If you can get a shot in." Michael grinned while taking in her rigid posture. He hummed slightly and added, "JJ, I'm here no matter what. That is a promise. I'm assigned and it's a done deal for the next few months or so. I'm not going anywhere." He peered at her and repeated, "Not going anywhere."

JJ looked at him. She felt like she was going to hyperventilate but she wasn't. She nodded, "That's all I want."

"He is unbroken and vigilant in his task," Michael said with a soft smile before getting out of the car.

JJ blinked as she processed what he said before getting out on her side. He didn't allow her to say anything but handed her the keys and shooed her to her door. She had her door unlocked and opened when she turned to tell him to come in and she would call a cab and found that he had left. He wasn't hard to spot but she realized he wouldn't respond if she called out, not if she wanted to wake the neighbors. She watched as he walked down the street with his hands in his coat pocket like there wasn't a care in the world.

It was going to be a tough sell to the team in the morning when they learned the truth; that she was the new section chief and Emily was under investigation. It occurred to her that Michael told her in his own fashion that he would be there for them all. He had her back and theirs. He was ever watchful and he wouldn't hesitate to say something or do something if it was needed. It wasn't the cure for the problem that was looming before them but it would help. That always watchful presence would be there. And it was comforting.

 _Somewhere in the night a quiet professional is waiting. He does not care that he is tired. That his hardened body is sleep deprived. He is unbroken and vigilant in his task._ – Mingo Kane, author of 'Scars of The Prophet'

* * *

 **A/N:** JJ is apprehensive about the fact that Barnes made her section chief while Emily is being investigated and looks to a steady rock, a quiet professional for foundation. Tag to Cure.


	15. 13-14 Bad Air

**Bad Air**

 _Oppression makes us big and small. Expressive and silences. Deep and dead._ – Cherrie Moraga

"To be honest, I don't see any reason why you should even be here."

Michael sat in the chair across from Assistant Director Barnes, taking in the hawkish stare she was giving him. His disposition suggested a blasé attitude since he was barely reacting to her scrutiny. He replied, "And I don't at times either but my CO seems to think otherwise. It's why I'm still here."

Barnes stared at the man that was sitting across from her. She didn't like him overmuch. That much was made clear when she dismantled IRT. The conversation was one that ended up with him making a comment that she wasn't sure if it was an insult or not. Since then she had been trying to get him removed, citing that he was in violation of bureau policy. It didn't exactly work out.

Michael looked at Barnes. He privately called her a shrew and that opinion didn't change as he sat in her office. Their dislike of each other created tension that was oppressive in nature and you could cut it with a knife. He knew that she called him in on purpose since he had no reason to remain behind since she had already gave him the 'bad news' when he went in with JJ. He'd rather be out working the case but there were some lines he had to walk by. So he went as summoned and it didn't take him long to figure out that she was pulling him in while Emily was taking a break.

Barnes could tell that he wasn't going to instigate a dialogue and while she considered it to be on purpose, to let it show while she was recording their conversation was not in her best interest. "Doing what exactly? Better question, what is your role for DIA and the BAU?"

"As it says, I am a liaison but also training in profiling so as to help if and when I return to my unit." Michael gave a slow blink as he replied, giving the standard answer and knowing full well that it was going to infuriate the woman. "Interagency cooperation if you will."

"Interagency cooperation my ass," Barnes replied as she leaned forward and placed her hands on her desk.

Michael recognized the maneuver and commented, "Leaning forward to assert dominance. Rising to a standing position, designed to convey superiority in a nonverbal cue while relaying…"

"Stop."

Michael did what she said and stopped. "Only commenting on observation," he replied with a sober expression along with a slight shrug and shake of his head. "I mean there is nothing new to be found about this conversation."

"And that is where you are wrong."

Michael raised his brow slightly. The tone implied a challenge. To back away or engage would give Barnes ammunition. He was just going to have to play it by ear. "Pray do tell," he replied, his tone taking a slight mocking tone.

"You have been with the BAU for almost a year minus your four weeks of deployment," Barnes commented as she stared at him with narrowed eyes. "You are in a unique position. I can't get rid of you since that is going over my head…"

"And you want me to tattle for you. Not the best course of action." Michael shook his head as he gave a knowing smile. "And I will not play that game."

"You are instructed to follow orders."

"Orders that involve my liaison position. If I am called up, I pack my bags and ship out to the assignment. Stateside, I am with the BAU learning about profiling and assisting on cases. I do not subscribe, and won't ever, to childish games all because you want to be director someday and want to look good. Even if it means trampling on everyone else who has no aspirations." He gave a slight snort at that and continued, "That does not build rapport."

"And you think you know better?"

"I know that you only want to do what you convince yourself is right in order to advance yourself. You hide behind policy and rules and regulations so you have a leg to stand on should others fall."

"You are walking a thin line."

"Not the first time." Michael looked at Barnes in the eye. He could tell he had made her pissed. He didn't care but he was aware of the consequences that could follow. He would have to do what he could so the team wouldn't be affected. He leaned forward to straighten up a little. "My job is to root out those that dare to try and oppress those that want a better life. Over there it was stopping the terrorists and I've been in firefights that no one should have to be in. Here it is to find the criminals before they hurt more people. I can read a situation with all its players and calculate probability to ensure the best course of action within a matter of seconds. The same kind that has seen me through several ambushes, dehydration in the desert and securing an unsub who was suffering from PTSD. All that and I still manage to do a job here that is just as demanding as my real job."

Barnes was quiet for a few moments. She wasn't sure of what to say since she had only read what was given to the FBI courtesy of DIA. And that wasn't very telling. Finally she said, "And as of now you work for me."

"I am a liaison. I work with. Not for."

"We'll see about that." Barnes sat back in her chair as she studied him. "As long as you have clearance to be and work in this building, you do work for me. So you will do as I say."

"I highly doubt that."

"And prove that loyalty is higher than following protocol?"

The question was meant to be mocking. Michael took it as that and replied, "A leader is one who knows the way, goes the way, and shows the way." At the look he was getting he added, "John C. Maxwell. Pastor."

"Are you mocking me?"

"No more than what you are doing to me," Michael countered. He stood up. "Now if we are done with our tete a tete, I will go and check up on the case that the team is assigned to."

"No. We are not done. Sit down." Barnes sat in her see nearly glaring at Michael.

Michael stared at her with a bland look, taking in her glare and posture he didn't sit but stood in a respectful position. "Then what else do we have to talk about?"

Barnes took a couple of breaths as she decided on her choice of words. She was irritated that the man in front of her seemed to have an answer for everything. What she didn't realize was that he was doing exactly what he explained to her he could do. He was reading her and responding but not in a positive manner but in a manner to get her angry and riled up and also reveal that he wasn't going to be easily pushed aside. She stopped the audio recording. Finally, she said, "I dismantled IRT because, while effective, was risking integrity of the bureau with personal vendettas."

"I highly doubt that but continue."

Barnes narrowed her eyes at the polite comment that she suspected was mocking her and continued, "I will not hesitate to do the same for the BAU. But… if you do as I tell you, then that won't happen."

"I won't play that game, Barnes," Michael replied as he shook his head in a negative fashion while keeping eye contact. "I don't play those games and to suggest you can order me to do so will be detrimental to the code of honor I live by as a quiet professional."

"You will inform me of everything that goes on with the team with Agent Jareau in charge," Barnes countered with the hint of finality in her voice.

"You will get my field reports like everyone else. Take it or leave it." Michael stared at Barnes, keeping eye contact.

Barnes hated being manipulated. She was backed in a corner since she really couldn't get rid of him and he was following protocol within the tenets of the liaison position. It had her wondering what kind of influence he had at DIA given that he had such freedom of movement. She wanted to use that but he wasn't biting, unless she gave a little. "Fine."

"Glad to see we understand each other," Michael replied with a polite smile as he straightened up. "Do understand though that if you pull anything out of context to wage this petty office war of ours, you will hear from me."

"Is that a threat?"

"A warning."

"Get out." Barnes couldn't help but snarl out her order. She waited until he was at the door to add, "Don't get too comfortable. Changes will be made."

"And the BAU team will always be there." Michael closed the door of her office gently, more than what he felt. He took a deep breath and left, wanting to head back to the BAU bullpen and check in with Garcia about the case.

It wasn't until Emily came back from Barnes office with bad news that he apologized, "Sorry Ems. My fault."

Emily knew that she had gone on an offensive with Barnes. Her refusal to name a fall guy played her into the woman's game and had her placed on administrative leave indefinitely. She didn't blame Michael at all. "It's not your fault."

"I disagree," he replied gently, "Considering I essentially told her to shove it."

Emily felt her lip twitch into a smile. It wasn't exactly the appropriate time for that but she was fond of Michael. Part of it being that he was very much like Reid but also because he was opposite of Reid in many other ways and he still managed to be a southern gentleman. "Now I know you had a more elaborate way of saying that."

Michael gave a slight smile as he picked up a stack of files and moved them. "Rapid fire calculations."

"You reacted to her and egged her on."

"She pushed my buttons too. And to sound a bit childish, she started it by going after IRT."

"And I get why you called her a shrew."

Michael looked up from his work. "An honest truth substantiated by actions." He went back to sorting them out and getting them ready for sign off. He sighed and added, "She tried to get me to be her spy on the team."

"And being you, you said no."

"Told her that I wouldn't sneak around like that. She could read the reports like anyone else." Michael would have stopped there but he knew that Emily would press. So he added, "And I warned her that she better not take anything I say out of context or else."

Emily's eyes went wide, "Mike, that is the equivalent of a threat."

"It was a friendly warning." Michael leaned on top of the files and looked at Emily. "Ems, I've seen what happens when the context is removed so it fits another person's agenda. Believe it or not, there are more than one team working for DIA and each have their own CO directing things and a few were grabbing for the promotion. Hurt good men, good teams burned."

"Still that doesn't mean you should do or say anything that could be taken the wrong way," Emily countered, scandalized at this seemingly reckless behavior.

"And in black ops, we have a thing called leverage." Michael looked at her pointedly. "You know what I mean, Ems," he added to remind her how he got involved with her situation with Ian Doyle.

"And what do you have on Barnes?"

"The ear of my boss, who has the ear of other individuals that carry clout."

"You actually will play that game?"

"I pray I don't have to use it. But I will." Michael adjusted his position to look at Emily. "I won't let this team be torn apart like IRT was. We had little to no defense and were set up to look bad. Here… I doubt we will be in a position like that but I wouldn't put it past Barnes. I know you rattled her cage by calling her out."

Emily made a slight face and nodded in agreement with that. "I hope you're right about this."

"Let her call it the mandatory review but I do have confidence that we will show her that she is barking up the wring tree."

Emily replied soberly, "I hope you're right too."

"I know I am on this one." Michael countered. He then grinned as he added, "Rapid fire probability." He picked up the stack of folders to take them back to be filed.

Emily watched him leave. She didn't have a doubt that he rattled Barnes' cage with his manner of speaking but not telling. If there was a fault with Michael Nassar, it was that he showed his hand when he did something like his warning to the assistant director. He was just lucky that Barnes didn't see that flaw; she was cultivating her dislike of the man. She could only hope that his luck would hold out as it had.

Michael was thinking the same thing. He paused to look up at Emily's office. As he did so, he put his hand in his jacket pocket and pulled out what looked like a spare button. He glanced at it and muttered, "We have a thing called leverage, Ems."

Putting it back in his pocket, he went to go check on Garcia. He needed to hear her peppy voice and nature. It was probably one of the few things that could relieve the bad air that hung around the place. In the meantime he would think about how to approach this situation since he pretty much knew the score. He could only imagine how the team would take it when they got back. He would do as he always had and that was assume the role of protector but even he knew that there were going to be some difficulties. The best he could do was to stand by JJ and be there to help when she needed it and hope that he wouldn't have to take drastic measures.

 _In peace there's nothing so becomes a man as modest stillness and humility: But when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger._ – William Shakespeare

* * *

 **A/N:** Mike has a chat with Barnes and warns her that he will not play her game. Tag to Miasma.


	16. 13-15 Generate

**Generate**

 _I must lose myself in action, lest I wither in despair._ —Alfred Lord Tennyson

 _Is this the end?_

Hearing the fluttery panic and fear in her voice at the uncertainty before them was enough to drive him into anger. He felt his teeth grit as he kept his composure in front of AD Linda Barnes, or the shrew as he called her. Michael Nassar looked at Barnes, well aware that the feeling of shock and disbelief was permeating the room.

Barnes was looking at Michael as if to dare him to make a scene. As if to prove he wasn't fit to be there; that he was too reckless to be part of a prestigious unit. She had just split up the team, but like he had pointed out to her, she couldn't do anything to remove him. His position was something of a mystery to her but clearly rooted in the upper echelons of the FBI and DIA.

Michael took a step towards Barnes and replied in a calm tone that could be considered scary by those that knew him, "You're making a mistake, Barnes."

"I am doing what is best. I suggest you do the same."

Michael waited until she had walked away before muttering, "I warned you."

The hardest thing was not to talk about it and leave with everyone there trying to process what was going on. He barely paused to give Emily the briefest of looks before continuing on his new mission. It looked cold but he was focused as his brain ran through possible scenarios of what to do. They ranged from the least amount of causing trouble to the one that was most extreme and what he was willing to do.

"Mike."

Michael heard the voice as he walked through the halls to exit the building but he didn't stop. He had to run through all the possibilities before making the decision. Then it was full speed ahead and once the train left the station…

"Mike, hold on."

"Don't follow me, Spence," Michael said as he walked to where his car was parked.

Spencer Reid was just in much shock as anyone but he knew his almost big brother. He knew the man was working a plan and it wasn't going to be pretty. He didn't know what Michael did for the army but he knew how meticulous he was when it came to planning and executing when he was in seek and destroy mode. He recognized the look on his friend's face when Barnes told him off after he said she was making a mistake. He persisted, "Mike, stop. Please."

Michael would have stopped but he couldn't. He deactivated the alarm and unlocked the door. He couldn't involve them, especially Spencer. This was something he knew he could and had to do to make things right.

"I know what you're up to."

Michael closed his eyes and let a hand drop on the roof of his car. He sighed but still didn't turn around as he replied, "And you know why I told you not to follow me." He turned to look at Reid and continued, "Plausible deniability."

Reid stared at Michael. He swallowed slightly and replied, "I know that but… But you don't need to do this alone."

"Yeah, I do," Michael nodded. He ran a hand through his hair. "What I have in mind… not something you or anyone on the team should know about."

"So you're going to do what you do best?"

"I don't want to but…" Michael looked at Reid. His expression became somber as he looked at Reid. He then asked, "Did you ever ask yourself what it was I do?"

"A lot, but I never… never asked."

"I know."

"I knew that you did things with your team and it involved killing and other things."

"Part of it." Michael cleared his throat slightly and explained, "My rapid fire calculations along with the intel gatherings… lot of things go on that you and everyone will never and can't know. Even with the Freedom of Information Act and declassification. All to let you go to bed and sleep without fear. So that Rory and Michaela can grow up without fear."

Reid blinked and shuffled on his feet. He knew where this was going and he had to hand it to Michael for reminding him that he now had a newborn that was depending on him. He didn't back down though and replied, "And I want you to know that we will fight this."

Michael gave a slight smile and shook his head slightly, "And you'll have to do it your way. Which will probably be the right way. Ems will know how to make it happen."

"And… and what about you Mike?" Reid gestured at his brother. "Your way… There's…"

"Oh believe me, I know the risks." Michael gave a tap to his temple. "Can't stop with the calculations." Looking at Reid, he sighed, "Look, Spence. I'm going to work and play nice but what I do to make this right… Make sure that all sides of the story are told." He saw the look of panic on Reid's face and reassured in an almost joking tone, "Don't worry, Spence. Nothing extreme."

"What are you going to do?" Reid didn't want to ask the question but he knew he had to. He had to know what his best friend and practically older brother was going to do. He saw the signs and he wanted to make sure that it wasn't going to be anything that would put Michael in a position that could mean prison time or worse.

Michael saw the look and changed the subject slightly, "You know that I was actually pretty good as a lawyer for those six months or so." He saw Reid frown slightly but he was following the conversation. He continued, "My talent was research. Gathering enough information to plead my case to the judge for a ruling. It drove home what it meant to build a case."

Reid stood there looking at his friend. He got the feeling that Michael was telling him that he wasn't going to do anything extreme, but he wasn't sure. He saw the look on Michael's face and the way he looked at Barnes. He knew better than anyone that look meant a plan of attack and it was going to be painful and bloody. Maybe not in the literal sense, but it was seek and destroy and often it was to Michael's own detriment in his strong and sometimes overblown sense of justice.

Michael looked at Reid and knew what he was thinking. They had been roommates and friends before now and essentially knew each other very well. They were very close despite the turn in direction of their choices and continued to be so. Everyone was fond of saying that they were alike but two halves of a whole. Right now, Michael could see his little brother trying to process what he was trying to tell him. If there was one thing that put them on opposites was Michael's liking of using examples that never seemed remotely related to the conversation. It was only a testament to how his mind worked.

Standing there, Michael smiled and strode towards Reid. He put a hand on his shoulder and said, "Don't worry about it, Spence. Like I said, my talent is research."

"And I'm… afraid of what that actually means," Reid admitted with a worried expression. "I almost lost Emily. I can't lose you too."

Michael paused a moment before replying, "Things have a way of working out in the end, Spence. They always do and I believe in one reason."

"You don't have to skirt around the fact that you believe in God, Mike. Everyone knows that." Reid made a slight face and slightly rolled his eyes. "I don't know if I have the same belief as you. That things will work out."

"Look on the bright side, you'll be home at a decent hour and I know you like spending every minute with Michaela just like I like to with Rory." Michael gave his charismatic grin that had people smile no matter what. "Don't worry too much. Things have a way of working out."

Reid could keep it up but he knew it was futile. Michael would just keep saying the same thing until he gave up and left. He wanted to believe that things would be okay but… Sighing he nodded, "Okay. I'll take your word for it."

"You have to believe, Spence. If not now, then find it."

Reid started to say something but then decided against it. Something told him that while he was thinking the worst, there might be something that he was missing and maybe it might not be as bad as he thought. He opened his mouth and then closed it before saying, "I don't know about what will happen next but… I believe in you Mike. You've proven it over the years and I wish I could say I did the same for you."

Michael's lip twitched in a half smile, "And as usual, you give yourself too little credit, little brother." He patted Reid's shoulder. "You just having that faith, trusting me… says a lot. And you grew up." With a playful smirk he gave a gentle punch to Reid's shoulder.

"I've been grownup. Ever since I met you," Reid retorted just as playfully. "And Sophie did the rest."

"She's the best," Michael nodded in agreement. "The only one who understood and would brook no nonsense."

It was a moment between the two as they chuckled in agreement. It relieved some of the tension there and Reid felt a little better at what was to come. He still wasn't satisfied in that he didn't know what his brother was up to but… He knew that Michael was careful in some way and if he heard him right, he had a plan. He just didn't want to get anyone involved just in case it went sideways.

"You should go home. Gen will be wondering where you're at."

Reid looked up to see Michael giving a kind and understanding look. "Gen knows the job."

"Not the point, little brother."

"I know." Reid sighed, trying not to raise his voice. He didn't like that he almost hit Michael when he came back to the BAU after being released but his brother got it. Probably understood on a level that very few people did. "But she does know the job."

"Sarai does too. Doesn't mean that she is happy when I get home late."

Reid made a face. His brother would know since he had been married first and had a kid first. "Alright." He turned to head to his car. He paused and turned to look back at Michael, who was leaning against his. "Mike…"

"Yeah, Spence?"

"Don't… don't…" Reid paused since what he wanted to say sounded like a scolding. "Just… be yourself."

"Since when am I not?" Michael gave a wry grin before Reid got into his car and left.

Michael watched his friend pull away and sighed. Reid knew him too well and he wanted to beg him not to do anything extreme. He had heard it when Reid said his last words but he didn't utter them. It was enough for Michael to change his mind about what he intended to do. For his little brother he would do it.

The drive home was quiet and allowed Michael to think about what he was going to do. The more he thought about it, the more he thought Reid was right to say what he said to him. This whole thing with Barnes wasn't like what he had to do when he was sent out of country. The same methods may be needed but the use was what differed. And thinking about it, he realized that it was what the team would need. They needed him to be the steady one and it was a role he fulfilled naturally; being the rock when they were stuck, especially for JJ and Emily.

As Michael entered his home, he took in everything that he and Sarai had built. He was distracted by the piano playing and smiled. He walked to the parlor and leaned against the doorway and watched his daughter Aurora play the piece he had been writing. She had taken to playing what he had written, saying that he made the best music and nothing pleased him more. Watching her reminded him the circumstances that put him in this position.

He knew well the game that was played in the upper echelons of the agencies that ran the government. He knew what Barnes' game was and as much as he didn't like it, the decision he made in the car ride home was the best route. He would play the game as he had done previously but he would do what he could to make things right. In the end, things did have a way of working out. He would be there for JJ in her new position and help in whatever way he could. The same for Emily and everyone else on the team and one day they would fix this.

 _From the depth of need and despair, people can work together, can organize themselves to solve their own problems and fill their own needs with dignity and strength._ —Cesar Chavez

* * *

 **A/N:** The team is split up and Michael has a plan. Reid knows he's up to something and tries to make Mike see another option. Tag to Annihilation.


	17. 13-16 Coming Up for Air

**Coming Up for Air**

 _Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy._ —Isaac Newton

The knock at the door had Linda Barnes look up. She scowled the moment she saw the face she disliked on sight but didn't refuse to invite in. She snapped, "Come here to gloat?"

Michael Nassar straightened up from where he had been leaning against the doorframe and gave a slight shake of his head as he walked in, "No."

Barnes sighed, not wanting to deal with him, but couldn't resist, "Then what are you here for?"

Michael came to stand in front of her desk. He didn't take a seat since that would imply that he was invited in. Even though she did, he wasn't going to press luck especially if she wasn't in the mood for it. He took in her hawk eyed, narrow expression and replied with a slight shrug, "Just… to tell you that the idea for having profilers dispersed in other field offices isn't a bad idea."

Barnes looked at him with a raised brow, "You came all the way up here just to tell me that?"

"Why not?" Michael shrugged his shoulders. "If you think about it, it is a good idea. Assigning trained agents in profiling to field offices and have them report to the main team here… Not at all different from what the FBI does in general. Right?"

Barnes couldn't believe what she was hearing. She half expected the man to rub his victory in her face. She really couldn't fault him since he did do his job for the BAU but she always suspected that he was working against her. She couldn't prove it and he was too careful to let it slip. No one could fault him for his behavior, even when he went rogue and worked with the team. Just seeing him there in her office and talking about that…

Folding her hands to maintain a degree of civility, she peered at him and asked, "What do you want, Captain Nassar?"

"Just came in to tell you that," Michael replied. He blinked somberly as he continued, "Not all ideas are bad. Just depends on the execution."

"So you are coming to gloat."

"No."

Barnes scoffed at that and glowered when she failed to get a rise out of the man. "Please. You were the one that threatened me about misdirection with your reports and said I was making a mistake and look what happened. You got your team back and I'm hands off. You got what you wanted."

"Wait," Michael held up his hand to stop Barnes. "What makes you think you know what I wanted?"

"You got your team back and me out of it." Barnes made a gesture and looked at Michael like he was an idiot for not seeing it. "What more do you want?"

"All I wanted was a fair shake from you, Linda," Michael replied in a soft tone. He noted her surprise when he dared to be familiar with her. "I get the whole wanting to look good for the brass and the community since ultimately public perception affects cooperation. Same thing in the army. Right now people don't like us. They think we're in a war we shouldn't be in, but that's just politics."

"In case you haven't noticed, politics is everything."

"And look where that got you."

It was blunt but the delivery was gentle. Barnes was having a hard time believing that she was not telling him to get out but hanging onto every word despite the fact that she didn't like hearing them. She pursed her lips before replying, "Are you saying you know the game?"

"I've been around this block before," Michael admitted with a slight grin. He looked down at Barnes as she remained rooted to her chair and continued, "Like I said all I wanted was a fair shake from you.

"I read your personnel file, the ones that basically HR can see. And I can tell you have talent as an agent and good in the politics game. It would have been an interesting ride to work with you."

"That I have a hard time believing since you made it clear that you didn't like me."

"Considering that you pulled the same crap with IRT and shut them down… Didn't give favorable opinions." Michael pursed his own lips and stared at Barnes. He leaned on the back of the chair but refused to sit in front of it.

Barnes made a slight face and shifted to find something to focus on but couldn't. Looking up at Michael, she said, "Then why would you say that you would have liked to work with me? You obviously are against me…" She made a gesture.

"I never said that," Michael interrupted. He sighed at the look he was getting. He straightened up and ran a hand through his hair as he figured out what to say next. He turned towards Barnes and continued, "Linda, I would have worked with you but you are so anxious to get to the top that you ignore everything that has been good with the units, including the BAU. I mean, look at the numbers." He gestured at her computer and continued, "You'll see that the BAU has saved more lives because they studied human behavior. They know enough to get a general idea and prediction of what an unsub does. The FBI has had commendations from local law enforcement because we didn't step on toes but worked with them."

At his prompting, Barnes looked at her computer. On the screen was a file with the statistics and everything that Michael was saying. She looked at him and asked, "Is this what you were doing while pretending to follow orders?"

"What did you think I was doing?"

"More like putting together something to bring me down. Trying to find dirt. Wouldn't put it past you." Barnes gave a wry look at the man.

"I may know how to do things from my time in the army but I can tell you Linda, the thing that made my missions successful was my greatest skill set. Came from being a lawyer."

Barnes looked up at the man. True, she had his employment history and she was surprised that he would up and quit after six months to join the army like he did. She had his credentials and they were on par with Reid's. The man was rated Mensa and had been headhunted by federal and private sectors. She didn't understand and was part of the reason why she didn't like him over much.

Michael knew she was thinking about what he was saying and continued, "I would have worked with you. Thing is, you took something good and broke it. Then you tied hands. All that did was create resentment."

"And what do you know about leadership?"

"I am a captain and I've led teams." Michael studied the woman in front of him and noted her narrowed eyes. "The thing is a team is composed of individuals. You can't shut that on and off like a light switch. The secret when it comes to getting the teamwork is learning who you have in the group and playing to their strengths and strengthening the weaknesses. Someone falters, the team helps to keep things level. Plain and simple. You broke that Linda and it came back to bite you."

"Get out."

Michael sighed. He knew going in that it was going to be a conversation that would eventually get him kicked out but he felt the need to make himself clear. He was in the mindset that most people were essentially good. Certain aspects just got in the way like pride and arrogance. Things that all people suffered through. It was what made being a Christian a trial.

He started towards the door and about halfway there, he paused and turned to look at her, watching him. He added, "Good PR is good, Linda, but not at the expense of alienating the vast majority of those crimes happen to. Every victim matters no matter what station."

Barnes was going to say something but Michael just gave a slight smile and wished her a good day. Her mouth hung open for a moment as she processed the fact that nothing about their conversation was gloating on his end. It was merely pointing out the error and a suggestion for next time. Surprising herself, she found herself saying, "Wait."

Michael paused at the door and turned back. He kept any thoughts off his face as he found Barnes getting up from her desk and coming to stand in front of him. He was quiet as she studied him like she was thinking about what to say. He allowed her that and just waited. Patience was one of the virtues he had at times and knew how to exercise.

Finally, Barnes asked, "Do you think that plan would work?"

Michael blinked for a moment as he processed what she had asked him. He studied her to get a sense for her intention before answering, "It is a good one and a means of also helping local law enforcement learn profiling."

It was diplomatic and Michael was no stranger to being that. He was better at it than a few teammates he knew and his fellow captain and friend were always the ones to be negotiators in certain situations. This was no different and he was still on unfamiliar territory with Linda Barnes. He was well aware that he disconcerted her by being so polite. He waited to hear her response.

Barnes studied Michael as if looking for any sign of subterfuge. She wasn't sure about him but she was certain that people would be affronted if they called him a liar and he certainly wasn't. If anything he was the epitome of being a gentleman if his manners were anything to judge by. She then asked, "Would you be willing to work with me on a proposal of sorts?"

Michael shifted slightly as if to determine if he heard her right. "What sort of proposal?"

"The one you just gave. I am under orders not to touch the BAU but…"

"I hope that this isn't an attempt to undermine that," Michael politely interrupted, making clear that he wasn't going to play that game.

"It's not." Barnes felt her tone get snippy and paused to curb it. "Just… you make a point. I do care about the face of the FBI and… you seem to grasp diplomacy quite well."

"Considering that that I am sort of an ambassador when I am deployed… comes with the territory."

"Can you help me or not?"

"I can. The question is whether or not I will," Michael pointed out. He adjusted his stance to appear not threatening but firm and someone presenting an argument. "There is that saying that goes 'Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.' I hope you can understand the implications of that."

"I do and…" Barnes looked to the side as she tried to humble herself. Swallowing her pride, she looked back up at the man and continued, "I understand if you don't want to. You have more than enough reason. This is not a means of undermining the BAU. That I can guarantee."

"There are no guarantees, Linda," Michael countered with a gentle grin. "But I will provide assistance should you require it within reason. I am still liaison to the BAU."

It was more than Barnes deserved. She couldn't get how the man was willing to have a decent conversation with her after everything. She was well aware he called her a shrew but he never showed any outbursts or anything that could be considered insubordination. It had her baffled. "I understand," she replied with a nod and turned to return to her desk.

Michael watched her and with a slight click of his tongue on his teeth, he said, "It won't be an overnight thing, Linda. To gain some measure of trust takes time. It's far harder to earn it after it's been broken."

Barnes would have said something but Michael was out the door. Her jaw hung open as she stared at the door that clicked softly into place. She really wasn't sure what possessed her to ask _him_ of all people for assistance. She knew he didn't like her and she didn't like him and yet he endeavored to treat her with respect. He had no reason to be as nice as he was. Hell, she would have preferred that he had gloated and instead he was like… she had no idea and it was a complete one-eighty from what she was able to get from his military file. What he said made her think and maybe… _maybe_ he had a point. She would just have to wait and see and work with him.

Michael didn't say anything as he made his way back to the BAU. It was better that the team didn't know and he was happy that they were back together. He got the feeling that Barnes wasn't a bad person. So, he decided to give her an opportunity to show it. The team didn't have to know about it and if they did need a lifeline, there was that possibility. It would take a miracle but he believed it could happen. Just a matter of making peace between enemies.

 _If you want to make peace with your enemy, you have to work with your enemy. Then he becomes your partner._ —Nelson Mandela

* * *

 **A/N:** It is easy to gloat in victory but Mike is all about making peace as he goes to Barnes' office to have a little chat. Tag to Last Gasp.


	18. 13-17 Somber Clowns

**Somber Clowns**

 _While we try to teach our children about life, our children teach us what life is about. —_ Angela Schwindt

"Amazing what children can teach us. About compassion and forgiveness."

They were words that Spencer Reid thought about as he watched Dylan give Mikey a hug. Both boys lost their fathers. One at the hands of one boy's uncle and the other because his father had been involved albeit unknowingly at the time. He watched as he stood with his best friend and older brother, Michael Nassar as they observed the two boys.

They had been called to Oklahoma to investigate murders of father figures across state lines. Dylan had witnessed his father's murder and had been able to provide a clue as to what it was that did it despite his being in shock when Reid met him. That in turn led to more clues about the unsub and eventually capturing the unsub.

Reid turned his attention to look at Michael. He studied the man. Throughout the case, Michael had stayed at the hospital helping to try and get Dylan to talk. Reid watched as he held completely one sided conversations with the boy and occasionally speaking to the boy's mother. The man didn't even flinch when the drawing revealed that the unsub was dressed as a clown and it was known that Michael didn't like them overmuch. It only went to show how the man could put aside his fears and apprehensions and get the job done like the quiet professional he was.

Michael watched the two boys and couldn't help but smile gently. For his working life, he spent it in the field and facing some of the most evil people in the world. Most would have gone jaded with the fighting and killing. For him, it was a blessing that he had what he had in this life: his wife, his daughter, his best friend and brother and a professional civilian family that kept him rooted. Watching the two boys was like watching hope for mankind in this world that was a work in progress. He added, "We spend time trying to teach us how the world functions and they teach and remind us what it should be."

Reid looked at Michael and made a slight gesture at the two boys, "Do you think that they'll be okay?"

"I'm not a shrink, Spence, but… kids are tough," Michael admitted. He grinned a little and nudged Reid gently, "If I recall, you were pretty tough yourself."

Reid shook his head and smirked a little. Michael always thought the best of him even when it was obvious he had been a nerdy wimp as a kid. "You always seem to think that."

"Cause it's true."

Reid looked at his brother and raised his brow. Michael explained, "Strength is not always about muscle, Spence. You know that."

Reid nodded. He couldn't forget the times in school when he stood up for Michael, especially when people started snubbing him because of his last name and the whole phobia and fear mongering of Muslims. It surprised him at the time and was one of those things that was always a surprise to his friends and colleagues. He looked at the boys and then frowned at a thought he had. He later asked Michael on the plane back to DC, "Do you… see us in them? Sal and Tony?"

It was a legitimate question since Michael had always been the one to look after Reid and would willingly take the brunt of things to prevent him from getting hurt. Michael could see where Reid was going and it was a step in the direction of his wanting to know what Michael did for DIA. He thought about it and looked at Reid to say, "No."

Reid studied the man, not to try and determine if he was lying. "No?"

"I may get… passionate… about certain things especially if it affects my family but… I don't kill people like unsubs do." Michael leaned forward in his seat and rested his forearms on his knees. "I have killed people. Fathers, sons… and because they decided that killing someone because they think they are an infidel is the right thing to do. As a law enforcement officer, you've had to draw your gun and you've shot and killed people too. Hardly a fair comparison."

Reid watched the intensity fill Michael's eyes. Maybe it was a stupid thing to say but… "How do you know the lines?"

"Same thing as everything else, Spence. Moral compass," Michael replied as he relaxed his features. "We know the difference and the said thing is that in order to maintain the order we think is right is that we have to defend it in a similar manner. We are a violent species, Spence. But we try."

Reid nodded thoughtfully as he sat back in his seat. It didn't fool Michael and he prompted, "Are you asking yourself about your parenting skills?"

"You know me well," Reid replied with a slight grin. He sobered though and continued, "I know what we do and it worries me that what we do…"

"You're thinking of Hotch and what happened to Haley."

"How did..?" Reid frowned a little at that.

Michael sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. He looked at Reid as he rested his forearms on his knees. Better late than never was the thought as he admitted, "I have… been used by the FBI before now. Hotch requested my help and… Ems and Ian Doyle were another. I escorted her in Europe for a time."

Reid stared at his brother. It was a surprise to find that out and while he could be mad, deep down, he knew that he couldn't. He knew Michael's job and what entailed to do it. He could always find out since he had the clearance. He just never did and for reasons to protect the man who looked after him in more ways than one.

Michael looked at Reid, half expecting the ax to fall. His lip twitched slightly as he added, "I said what I said about the boys because… children can teach us or reteach us the things we've forgotten. That's what makes us different from Sal Capilano. Experiences shape us yes, but we choose not to use it as an excuse."

Reid nodded, understanding. It put him in a thoughtful mood the rest of the trip home. He thought about things as he finished his reports and headed home. He thought about it as he held his baby daughter, looking at her sleep in his arms. He knew he had a lot to learn about being a parent and he had some help but… it was a nice discovery for himself on what it meant to be a parent.

Looking at her sleep, Reid couldn't help at the marvel of that little life that he and Genevieve were ultimately responsible for. It still scared him at times that he was going to screw up the whole parenting thing. Give him a formula or let him ramble about innocuous facts on whatever subject he could handle. Being someone to teach someone else how to be part of the world and how to live in it… that was terrifying. He still wondered how Michael was able to do it.

The conversation and his thoughts about the case had him thinking. Maybe Michael was right in that children could teach adults or remind them what they themselves had forgotten. Reid never really had a normal childhood though that was somewhat rectified when he met Michael and Sophia. As a parent, he wanted that for Michaela. He wanted her to have good experiences that would encourage her in whatever she chose to do. He couldn't help but chuckle since that was the same thing Genevieve had said to him not too long ago.

He was probably overthinking things but… He had a good reason to and like Michael, he had some hope in people after watching Dylan and Mikey interact. Just as long as there were no clowns involved for a while.

 _I may not be perfect, but when I look at my children I know that I got something in my life perfectly right._ – Unknown

* * *

 **A/N:** Reid thinks about the boys Mikey and Dylan as he spends time with his own daughter. Tag to The Capilanos.


	19. 13-18 Dance of Intuition

**Dance of Intuition**

 _Have faith in your intuition and listen to your gut feeling._ – Ann Cotton

"I don't like him, Unca Rossi."

David Rossi listened to the whisper of the little girl and was in complete agreement with her. Something was off about Wick, Portia's fiancé, and even little Aurora was picking up on it. If he could package children's intuition, they'd have another secret weapon in the BAU arsenal.

Rossi hadn't expected to be babysitter that day when he asked Emily for the day off to meet his third ex-wife Krystall but he accepted the job with grace since he loved the little girl that was like her name, a ray of morning sunshine. Sarai originally was watching her but she got called in to the hospital she worked and the live in nanny had her days off to visit family in Baltimore. Rossi offered to watch his "niece" and Aurora begged her mother to say yes.

It made it a little awkward when he met up with Krystall but he explained what happened and Aurora was her cheerful little self. It had Krystall smile and comment that the little girl reminded her of her daughter Portia. It certainly helped break the ice for his ex to ask him to be her plus one to her daughter's wedding and he couldn't say no with a little girl beaming and urging him to say yes. It was then that he offered to give a tour of the BAU.

It was a little strange since he held fast to Aurora's hand but no one questioned it when he took his guests on a tour. To Aurora, she was seeing more of the place where her Baba and Uncle Spence worked. She grew even more excited to see her Aunt Penny and Garcia made a fuss over her goddaughter. All in all, the tour went well until Wick shot down Portia over a funny moment she was telling about.

Rossi was one of the original founders of the BAU. He and the first agents of the unit were the first to apply studies in human behavior to pinpoint unsubs, find them and arrest them before they hurt anymore people. Part of that was good old fashioned intuition and it told him that there was something up with Wick. Even more so when he felt Aurora tug on his jacket sleeve to get his attention and she whispered that she didn't like Wick. He asked in a low voice, "Why Rory?"

Aurora held onto Rossi's jacket and hung back, like she wanted to hide. Rossi got the hint that something was up and waited until she said, "He is a bad man."

It was a bold assumption to come from a child but Aurora wasn't a baby. She was nearing four years old but she was still a child and her world was distinguished between two ends: good and bad. Even though Rossi wasn't overly experienced with kids, he did have a grandson, he was astute enough to note her behavior and not take it lightly. He reassured her, "It's okay, Rory. I won't let him hurt you."

It was enough to prompt a smile from her little face and she came out of hiding. She stayed by him, not voluntarily going near Wick but she did with Portia and Krystall. It prompted Rossi to ask Garcia to do a background check on Wick. Not a deep dive but just enough to confirm or allay his suspicions. As much as he wanted to jump right in, he held back and partly because of the little girl he was responsible for.

It did help to have Aurora around when he had to break the bad news to Portia. Sarai had gotten held up at the hospital and asked if Rossi didn't mind a houseguest for the night. He didn't and enjoyed cooking for the little girl who imitated his Italian manner with giggles and pleasure. It certainly helped at dinner since she made his guests laugh and it gave him more of a chance to observe Wick. Later at bedtime she tugged on his sleeve as he was tucking her in.

"What is it Rory?"

"Wick is not good."

"Why?" Rossi had to ask. Partly out of habit and partly because he was curious as to why his niece didn't like the man.

"He didn't laugh when I was you," Aurora replied in a matter of fact tone. She stared with a serious expression on her face that Rossi thought he was talking to Michael for a moment. She then added, "He has a mean look."

Rossi listened to what she said and smiled, "Well don't worry about it my little bambina. I'll look into it."

"Cause you a profiler," she beamed as she stumbled over her word for 'profiler'.

"That's right. Now you need to go to sleep or I'll get in trouble with your mother."

"Okay. Night Unca Rossi."

Rossi accepted the hug and kiss that she had given him readily from day one. Even though it was her first time meeting him that day when Michael introduced the team to his daughter, she said he was good and responded favorably. So when she said that Wick was not good, he paid attention and as he hugged her and tucked her in, he made the resolve to get to the bottom of this. Not just for Aurora but for the woman who had briefly been his wife and her daughter.

Breaking the bad news had been rough and Portia thought her mother was trying to ruin things. Rossi tried to be the reasonable one and said that he did it on his own. Maybe it was bad timing or good timing when Aurora piped up saying, "Unca Rossi did it to help."

It certainly made the rest of the day interesting considering that Rossi deemed it prudent to make a discrete exit. Plus Aurora's needs took precedence. He took her to his home and watched as she took fascination with his things but of course she was drawn to the piano. One look and he had a booster seat in place on the bench for her and she decided to be saucy and played Chopsticks.

It had him laugh and relieve some tension from the day. He was able to give his full attention to Aurora when she said, "I'm glad you told Portia about the bad man. She's a nice lady."

Rossi couldn't agree more. He gave a smile as Aurora started on a piece that he wasn't familiar with. He asked, "What are you playing Rory?"

"Baba's music."

Rossi was impressed. He knew that Michael was a pianist. A very talented one. As Reid said, the man liked and played football and played piano. He remembered Aurora's performance at the Christmas gathering so he knew she could play. It was just amazing to see her play without sheet music for reference. She had her father's talent. "It's beautiful, Rory."

"Baba calls it 'Il mio più caro amico'," Aurora explained as she focused on the keys. "He said it was Unca Rossi's song."

Rossi felt his lip twitch into a slight smile. "Really?"

"Uh huh. I saw the music and played."

Rossi smiled and would have said something when the doorbell rang. He turned in the direction of the door and then looked at Aurora. When it rang again, he sighed. He started to head in the direction of the front door saying, "Stay right there, Rory."

All Rossi heard was the piano playing and went to answer it. It was Wick and the little punk tried to tell him otherwise. In the end Rossi made him see the light and nothing serious happened. Aurora was fine and that was a relief since he did not want to be on the wrong side with Sarai. Michael would have understood but her…

In the end, Rossi didn't have regrets stepping in like he did. He just wanted to make sure Portia was going to be okay in her marriage and that the guy was a good one. He had seen one too many nice looking guys end up being the thing that were the stuff of nightmares. He couldn't just turn it off, not after all the years he had been on the job. It was his superpower so to speak. It was a disappointment to Krystall but in the end, things were okay between them as friends. And he owed it to the little girl who was like a little detector.

 _I do believe that every person has an equal opportunity to be a good and wise judge regardless of their background or life experiences._ – Sonia Sotomayor

* * *

 **A/N:** In addition to requesting time off, Rossi gets to spend time being babysitter for Aurora. Tag to Dance of Love.


	20. 13-19 After Parte

**After Parte**

 _Your truest friends are the ones who will stand by you in your darkest moments because they're willing to brave the shadows with you—and in your greatest moments because they're not afraid to let you shine._ – Nicole Yatsonsky

Simmons knew what he had to do. He wasn't going to sit by and wait any longer. Not while Kristy was in danger. They had found the way in to take the unsubs down. He just wasn't going to wait any longer than he had to. He looked at the door that would let him in through the ventilation access, where the unsubs were going to leave.

A hand touched him on the shoulder and he jumped the moment he heard, "Not like you to leave me out of the fun, Simmons."

Simmons turned to see Michael Nassar wearing a tactical vest. "I have to do this. Kristy's life is…"

"I know, Matt. You don't need to tell me." Michael's expression was somber and belied the fact that he understood the situation perfectly. "Now I get you probably could take them all out but you do need back up."

Simmons considered it for a moment. Even if he said no, Michael wasn't going to back down. The man would follow and cover his six. It was from years in covert ops since most of the time certain missions were done in pairs. "Fine," he said.

"Good. I was going to come anyway," Michael replied as he followed Simmons on with a more casual lope.

Once inside, they assumed tactical positions and started sweeps of the rooms of the law firm. Simmons was on point and Michael covered his six as they advanced to the conference room where the hostages were kept. Simmons could hear his wife whimpering as she tried to talk down the one pointing his weapon at her. Simmons was enraged and would have charged forward had it not been for Michael's tap to his shoulder.

Using hand signals, they took up their positions. One unsub was already dead. Another ended up dead when Simmons fired at him. The last one ended up creating a gunfight. Simmons was forced to regroup but there was purpose to it as he led the unsub away from the hostages. As he moved, he caught a glimpse of Michael making sure they were okay. The last he saw was he was with Kristy and checking her over. He knew that she was in good hands and it wasn't just because they both were soldiers. They were friends.

Eventually Simmons caught the unsub but he was so enraged at the danger his wife had been put in, he was ready to kill the man with the chokehold he had him in. The man was going to kill the woman that meant a lot to him, the one he loved, the mother of his children… He was angry.

"Matt, this isn't you!"

He wanted to kill him but hearing his wife's voice, Simmons knew he had to do the right thing. He let the guy go and looked up. He saw Kristy and he saw Michael standing there taking position. There was no expression on his face but Simmons knew that there were some things to talk about.

"It's clear," Michael was saying to the HRT team that had come in. He walked in and held out a hand to Simmons.

Simmons took the proffered hand. "Thanks, Mike."

"Better than planned."

It wasn't meant to be a joke but more of an attempt to alleviate the fact that Simmons almost crossed a line. Simmons was grateful for that and gave a nod to Michael as he took Kristy in his arms for a hug. It was a relief that Kristy was okay after everything. It wasn't until things were winding down that Simmons sought out Michael to thank him.

"Bit rough out there wasn't it?" Michael beat Simmons to it and gave a grin as he finished his report.

"Yeah," Simmons replied as he looked for the words to say. "Uh, Mike… thanks. For backing me up and…"

Michael gave a slight wave of his hand, "Like I said, I wasn't about to let you have all the fun."

"Mike…"

"I get it, Matt," Michael replied as he gave a gentle smile that revealed his southern gentleman persona. "I get how you feel." He sobered and gave a pointed look at Simmons.

Simmons took in the look that Michael was giving him. It was not a stern look. It was an understanding one. Then he remembered. Apart from Garrett with IRT, he was the only that Michael told about his POW experience in Afghanistan. Simmons was privy to some details that probably had not been told to anyone else except for maybe Reid. Here Michael wasn't asking for explanations of anything. As far as he was concerned it was another tactical plan that was executed and they saved lives. Most of the people in that law firm anyway.

Michael grinned, "Actually, I'm more worried that you'll be scolded for being stubborn about your phone."

Simmons couldn't help but chuckle in response to Michael's grin. He took the hand that Michael extended and it his was engulfed in a handshake and a look that said he understood and would stand by him. Michael hummed with a grin on his face as he said, "You better get going before Kristy comes at me for keeping you. See you tomorrow."

Simmons laughed a little at that and nodded, "Alright. I'll tell the kids you said hi."

"Same."

Simmons left for the night with a friend wave from Michael. Things were tense that day but in the end, even with his charging in, cooler heads did prevail. And it was all because he had his friends and colleagues behind him.

 _The power of one, if fearless and focused, is formidable, but the power of many working together is better._ – Gloria Macapagal Arroyo

* * *

 **A/N:** Simmons has to save Kristy and he had a little bit of help from a friend. Tag to Ex Parte.


	21. 13-20 All You Can Love

**All You Can Love**

 _Spiteful words can hurt your feelings but silence breaks your heart._ – Clive Staples Lewis

Penelope Garcia was all about love, peace, rainbows and sunshine. Her tech room at the BAU was a testament to that. She didn't like killing or the things that the team had to do to bring down an unsub but she understood the need. She helped in her own way. She stuck to the path of the light and all that was good. It was why she believed that the man, Jesse Wilson, that killed her parents in a drunk driving accident didn't need to serve out his full sentence.

She had gone to California for the parole hearing and to give the victim impact statement. Like her brothers she was angry at the man who chose to drive while under the influence. She even told the Jesse's sister that. She even went to see him as well. It stopped her to think about things. She thought about what she thought and her reasons why.

Garcia was not normally a spiteful woman. True she could get her feathers ruffled and let you have it if she was upset but she wasn't vindictive. She didn't like that and it scared and worried her when she saw Michael look like that before his last deployment. So when she thought about it and mulled over her reasoning, she knew what she was going to say and she went up and said it. She didn't believe that Jesse should serve his remaining sentence in prison.

Unfortunately it didn't sit well with her brother Carlos. He looked at her like she had betrayed him and the family. When she arrived he was determined to keep their parents' killer behind bars. Thinking about it now, he sounded vindictive, the very thing that she didn't like. In the beginning she felt the same but what she realized was the truth. Nothing she could say or do could bring their parents back and their killer, he was truly sorry for what he had done. He had thought about it every day he was in prison. That was what she thought.

It didn't help that she revealed to her brother that she thought it was her fault. After all she was the one that missed her curfew. If she hadn't, then her parents wouldn't have been out there looking for her and they wouldn't have had the accident. It certainly made a mess of things with her youngest brother and made her question herself a little but she decided to opt for some closure and went to go see her parents.

Looking back on it on her flight back to DC, Garcia was glad that she went to see her parents. She had a nice picnic conversation with them. She told them about her life since their passing, what she did. Her favorite was talking about the team and how they were good people. She couldn't help but gush over her favorite boy wonder duo especially how they were alike but not alike. When she was done it lifted a little of that burden off her shoulders. She just wasn't sure about Carlos.

Carlos was civil to her for the rest of her visit but Garcia could tell that he still felt that she betrayed him by what she said at the hearing. He was polite in conversation when she left and even gave her a ride to the airport, but it was anything but friendly. It bothered Garcia and she hoped Carlos would see what she was getting at. Their parents taught them that a big part of love is forgiveness. She knew that nothing that was said or done could bring back their parents but it could help them move on.

She had felt guilty and ashamed that when she came home that night and saw their note that she wished that they didn't come home. It was a terrifying thought that a wish made in the heat of the moment ended up coming true. In the end, she was able to talk to her parents about it and now she did feel all the better for it. She just wished that her brother wasn't so cold. What wasn't said hurt.

Sighing, Garcia trudged through the terminal. She knew she wasn't going to fix things that night. It was going to have to be a work in progress. She didn't like that she and Carlos left on a bad note and she didn't know how to begin to fix this. This wasn't something that could be fixed with her fluffy sayings and goodness that she was fond of doing.

"Aunt Penny!"

Garcia was brought out of her thoughts when she heard the nickname that she loved. She paused since she wasn't expecting anyone who knew her to be there. She started walking again.

"Aunt Penny!"

Garcia stopped and turned in the direction the voice was coming from. She gasped when she saw a whirlwind with curls running straight at her. She dropped her carry on and opened her arms just as her favorite little girl ran into full speed. She felt little arms squeeze tight around her middle and a little voice saying, "You're here!"

"Of course I'm here my sweet bundle of joy," Garcia replied, feeling very happy to see the little girl. She loved her godson Henry just as well but there was something about little girls and Aurora was a little ball of sunshine with everyone with a mischievous personality similar to her father's. Not to mention his talent on piano. "What are you doing here?"

Baba said you would be coming home from San Frasisco," Aurora replied as she stumbled over the syllables while sounding cute and adorable at the same time. "I wanted to come."

Garcia frowned a little at that since she didn't really give any flight information and she had planned to use lyft or uber. She looked up and saw Michael leaning against one of the pillars of the terminal with his arms crossed over his chest and giving that slight grin he got when he had a secret and you had to guess what it was since he wasn't going to tell. She gave him a look that he would recognize well before turning her attention back to Aurora, saying, "I'm glad you came. It's nice to be greeted."

"Cause I'm your bundle of joy!" Aurora beamed up at Garcia.

Garcia smiled at the little girl. By that time Michael had joined them and was picking up her dropped bags like nothing was out of the ordinary. She said, "I have luggage."

"Of course."

He was going to play that game, well Penelope Garcia could dish it back. And she did as she walked holding onto Aurora's hand with Michael down to baggage claim. She would say something and he would be that mischievous self of his that endeared him to her as much as Reid's cute oblivious nature with the obvious. As they walked through the terminal, Garcia felt better about everything that happened while she was visiting her brother. She really hoped that Carlos would eventually cool down about her statement but here and now… she was happy. She had friends and family that she loved and that was what kept her going even when faced with the ick of the cases they drew.

 _We love life, not because we are used to living but because we are used to loving._ – Friedrich Nietzsche

* * *

 **A/N:** Garcia has thoughts about what happened when she went to see her brother in San Francisco but she is reminded of the good things she has in DC. Tag to All You Can Eat.


	22. 13-21 Steadying Signals

**Steadying Signals**

 _Whenever there was a crisis, I found a man to help me take the edge off the feelings of helplessness and pain._ – Susan Cheever

The sound was rhythmic as the paper of the sander rubbed against the wood, going with the grain. It was consistent in pressure and technique. After every few strokes, a hand followed to test how smoothed down it was. It was mundane and yet satisfying as a means of decompressing and just tuning out the world. Perfect for just unwinding after a case and just to be lost in thought.

Tara Lewis looked at Michael as he continued what he was doing, with his back to her as she thought about how to best approach him. She knew he was pretty jumpy at times. It was part and parcel of his time in Afghanistan and residual post-traumatic syndrome from his time as a captive and wandering out in the middle of the desert.

She had talked to Alvez about how she knew that it was a folie a deux and her own experience with it. She was still in the mood to have a talk and it was a standing offer from Reid's friend that his door was open to it. He had joked that it was free therapy on his end too, bringing a lighthearted touch to the conversation and Tara thought it humorous too, but it did help since he noticed he seemed a little lighter after those conversations.

She had arrived at Michael's house, always amazed at the fact that he and his wife managed to purchase a beautiful home. Then again it wasn't a surprise if Michael was into investment and Sarai was well known in her field of medicine and she had her own money from her family. Sarai had welcomed her in and told her that her husband was in the basement decompressing.

Tara had to admit that she expected the typical man cave and thought the idea was a little funny. Michael may have been the more relaxed between him and Reid but she hardly thought him the type to have a man cave that would cater to beer and other things. When she walked down to the basement, she was surprised. It was a man cave of sorts. Just not what she expected.

She didn't expect the wood working tools. She did expect the semi-neatness. There was a small refrigerator in the corner and a couple of chairs but not the kind to really lounge in. Just like she told Alvez, there were things about her that he didn't know that could fill a book, Michael was more than meets the eye. She smiled at the man since he seemed to be stuck in his own world what he was working on.

"I recommend the lacquered one. There's a cushion on top of the box over in the corner where Rory plays."

Tara raised a brow and asked, "Rory plays in here?"

A chuckle was a response as Tara walked over to find the area had been cordoned off and childproofed. There were art supplies and a box of toys. She found the cushion and walked over to the chair that Michael suggested and sat down. "I stand corrected."

"I spend as much time as I can with Rory and she likes being with me."

"She loves you. Her favorite thing is when you play piano together." Tara crossed her legs and rested her hands in her lap. "Daddy's little princess," she added with a smirk.

"Just her finding out what she's passionate about. She's three, but…" Michael straightened up and used his forearm to wipe his brow as he turned to look at Tara. His right held the sander he had been working with and it and his hand had been covered with sawdust. "How they grow right?"

"I guess. I'm not a child psychologist, Mike," Tara replied with a smirk.

"I know but it's still the same thing with what you know. Just… one's for kids and the other adults."

Tara chuckled, "And leave it to you to just simplify everything."

"Simple is better at times." Michael shrugged his shoulders as he grinned at Tara. He held the sander in his hands and alternated it between hands as he asked, "So… you come down to learn my behind the scenes hobby?" He grinned as he moved to reveal the project he was working on.

Tara smiled as she took in the pieces that were obvious in what they were for. "Not really. Just wanted to talk. You seemed thoughtful about the case."

"Oh." Michael turned around and started his sanding again. He continued it for about three minutes before speaking, "Just thinking about this whole thing about the hum and the phenomenon. I read the studies done and the reports on the plane ride home."

"I watched you. You were staring into space."

Michael turned and grinned at Tara, "Spence is not the only one that can speed read." He chuckled to show how humorous he thought it was. "There are things about me that he didn't tell."

"I'm learning that every time we go out on a case," Tara nodded in agreement. She sighed as she straightened out, "So… what about it?"

"More about Caleb. The whole phenomenon and the folie a deux is fascinating but I was more thinking about him. Same as you were." He turned and gestured at Tara.

"Did you spy on us again?"

"No." Michael turned back and looked at her. "I was wearing my headphones."

"Yeah, about those…"

"I still hear them. The screams of terror. Even when the room is silent. Sometimes…" Michael paused and put his hands on the project he was working on. He looked downward and focused on the ground.

"Can you hear the hum?" Tara stood up with a concerned expression.

"No," Michael replied. He turned and looked at her. "Nothing like that. Just the screams of that one event that changed my life. And sometimes I hear the sounds from my MIA days." He cleared his throat. "I know we all have experiences that are similar to Caleb's. Watching people we care about suffering and feeling powerless to help no matter what. Just made me thoughtful. I know it did for you."

Michael put down the sander and went to the refrigerator. He opened and pulled out a couple of bottles of juice. He handed one to Tara. He pulled up the other chair and sat across from her. "It's not easy watching someone that matters go that way. It may be a different situation between you and me but… still the same feelings."

Tara took a sip. She never thought Michael to be a beer man though Reid had plenty of stories about him being in bars to watch football. What he said made sense. "You know you should have become a shrink yourself."

"Nah," Michael drawled, "I'm the guy that goes in with direction with rapid fire calculations. That's your job." He grinned as he sat back and took another swig from his bottle. He looked at Tara and asked, "Why'd you come here, Tara?"

Tara looked at the man as she held her juice. She twisted the bottle in her hands and sighed. "I just… wanted to talk. About the case and… about your thoughts. You were quiet even when we gave the profile."

Michael thought about it for a moment and looked at nothing on the wall. "Well… I didn't learn much about the hum until this case. In fact, when I was brought on to IRT, I didn't know much about profiling. I didn't study serial killers."

Tara knew that. She heard about how he ended up meeting he team having been first suspect as an unsub and then later ended up being the true target of the unsub. She knew that he had been drafted into IRT and then later, at Emily's request, moved to the BAU. No doubt the man felt out of his element since he didn't go through the FBI Academy course and learned how to profile. The team probably didn't think about it because he contributed in different ways that solved the case. It also helped that he was pretty good at tactical assaults.

She looked at him and said, "No but you've learned a lot being a part of the team."

"True," Michael acknowledged. He took another sip before standing up and putting in on a work table. He picked up his sander and started working. "Sometimes the motion of doing things can put a stop to it."

Tara frowned at that. She then thought about how when Michael went to work, he would pull out the headphones. It was a revelation. "That's the reason for the headphones."

Michael looked at her and smiled, "That's the reason now. Back in school, it was a means of tuning out the world while I worked."

"So all the times when you worked and put them on, you were hearing the noises from the past?"

"Not all the time, but pretty much." Michael turned to look at Tara. "Mostly now I just need to tune out the world to work, but I'm not completely unaware of what is going on around me." He grinned in a knowing look.

Tara took in the grin and asked, "You really aren't going to tell us how you do that headphones trick?"

Michael grinned, "No. Unless you actually manage to do so. That is the standing agreement. I will confirm when it is guessed correctly. Not even Spence has been able to guess correctly."

Tara hummed a bit as she chuckled. "Not even Reid?"

"Nope."

"Man, you are tough."

"Well I'm army. Kind of in the job description."

Tara grinned and asked, "Any idea if you'll be called again?"

"Oh, I'm always on call. In terms of deployment…" Michael shrugged his shoulders. He turned to look at Tara and added with an uncharacteristic gentle smile, "I'm okay with it. I don't like it but… still the job. Unique circs… It works out."

"More of your faith?"

"Pretty much." Michael grinned as he said it.

Tara knew that he was big on his faith and beliefs. He made no bones about it and never tried to push it onto others. He gave his opinion and left it at that. It was from another perspective. She then rounded back to what she had come there for, "So… are you really okay? After the case I mean?"

"Oh I'm fine Tara." Michael turned and pointed at her with his sander, "Question is, are you okay?"

"Me?"

"Like I said, different experience but the feelings are the same. For me… I will have those moments because it's the nature of the job and I still remember the feeling. Spence does too but it's different. Ems, Rossi, Alvez… you… Same feelings just different circumstances. It's why I don't like it when people say that I don't understand."

Tara looked at Michael and thought about what he said. She looked around and studied at nothing in particular. He was right and he didn't really try to be sympathetic like most people. The last time they had a serious discussion, he acknowledged her pain from when she nearly lost it with the truthers and their saying Sandy Hook wasn't real.

"I'm not saying that you get over things. You work through them and when something reminds you of that event… helps put things into perspective." Michael gave a shrug of his shoulders. "So… considering that you're going to be okay, how about helping me here? I'm making this crib playpen for Michaela." He gestured for Tara to approach.

"What?"

Michael didn't answer but gestured behind him for Tara to get closer. Tara frowned at his request but didn't say no. She approached and found a hand sander placed in her hand. She looked at the project he was working on and raised her brow quizzically until he told her to go with the grain and started working.

Most would think it bizarre that Michael switched tracks that abruptly but for those that knew him, it served a purpose and it was his personality. Tara moved the sander as she had been told and started mimicking Michael's movements. After a few minutes, she found the rhythm generated by it soothing. She cast a glance at Michael and found him pretty content in what he was doing. True, they all had bad experiences and it was advised that they have a means to decompress. Tara realized that she found one method she liked and that was talking to Michael. Even if it was over nothing, she found that she liked the calm he exhibited. It was steady even when he was in turmoil.

Grinning, Tara asked, "So, about your headphone trick."

Michael merely laughed.

 _Steadiness is coming up short nineteen times and succeeding the twentieth._ – Julie Andrews

* * *

 **A/N:** Tara and Mike have a conversation about the case and just decompress. Tag to Mixed Signals.


	23. 13-22 I'm a Believer

**I'm a Believer**

 _Belief in oneself and know who you are, I mean, that's the foundation for everything great._ – Jay-Z

 _"Mike, Spencer, just shoot her!"_

It is said that experiences shape a person. That included the good, the bad, and the ugly. The choices made in those situations determined the course a person took in life and who they ultimate were and would be. Often those moments came at a point in time where the decision you made decided the fate of someone you cared about. That was the exact situation Spencer Reid found himself in with his best friend and brother, Michael Nassar. They were in a standoff and Penelope Garcia's life was on the line.

Reid had started the day as normal and without any thought of the events that led him to this moment. He was nearing the end of his sabbatical and he was eager to get back with what he did best and that was profiling. His only regret was that his time with his daughter would be curtailed. He was understanding better how Hotchner and Michael felt. The day changed when he received the email.

It was a matter of requesting his sabbatical be ended due to exigent circumstances and Emily made it happen. Though he thought it was a little overboard stipulating that Michael go with him and stay by him no matter what. He couldn't escape it and truth be told, he was much more comfortable with Michael around just in case.

From the time they found Agent Owen Quinn to now, it had been a trip through uncertainty since nothing seemed to be nice and neat as it usually was when they profiled a case. It certainly seemed well times when Michael commented that they could always be certain of uncertainty. It was one of his weird philosophical comments but Reid couldn't help but think that was the case. He certainly couldn't see why things were off.

JJ said that the coincidence and the link between his arrest a year ago to now, was connected. Reid wasn't sure about that but he knew that his longtime friend was worried about him. Always was and he knew how hard they all fought for his freedom. It was still talked about that it was one and only time anyone had seen Michael fly off the handle. Well, Reid was an exception to that rule since he knew Michael the longest and had actually seen him fly off the handle. In the end though, Reid wasn't exactly sure how they were connected.

Things moved along once they realized that what Quinn discovered turned out to be the work of a cult. They were able to find Theo and figure out what happened. They had the Messiah. So it was a job well done. Reid opted to stay and talk to Quinn's family rather than go decompress with everyone else at Rossi's place. Then the trouble started.

The thing that was off was the fact that Quinn's fingertips had been burnt. It had nagged Reid and Michael didn't have to voice it but he was suspicious too. Quinn certainly didn't behave like someone who had been missing a year and Michael would know what it was like to be held prisoner and tortured. He still bore the scars, some more visible like when his hands would seem to lose feeling and he would nearly drop what he was holding or almost get a lockjaw effect in his hands. It didn't happen frequently which was why he was still on active duty and he was still allowed to carry a weapon.

Trouble came when they heard the shot from the elevator. Reid didn't hesitate and knew that Michael was on his tail as they raced down the stairs. Reid didn't fail to notice that Michael started carrying an alternate weapon recently and it had come in handy at times. It was almost comically the same as Hotchner when he carried a backup, but Reid didn't have a problem with it and was glad for the backup heading down to the basement.

It was logical to assume that Quinn had been converted to the Believers which was why Reid held his gun on the agent and made to apprehend him. They ended up being wrong when it was revealed that Quinn was shot and he tried to warn them of Special Agent Mary Meadows. Come to think of it, when she was in front of the team with the others from ViCap, Reid noticed that Michael seemed to shy away from her, like he was suspicious or maybe it was a bad vibe of sorts. He didn't think much of it at the time since Michael warned him that bad vibes he got often proved to be nothing and he did it with a grin. It was a signal that it should be taken seriously and Reid didn't.

Now they were in a standoff. Reid wasn't going to put his gun down and he knew that Michael wouldn't. Both had their guns trained on Meadows as she told Reid that he was going to help them get their Messiah out. There was no way Reid was going to let that happen. Until Meadows added the twist.

With a simple nod, a car pulled up to give him and Michael a clear view of the back seat. Reid felt his throat convulse when he saw Garcia in the back seat with a gun trained on her. He heard a slight snort coming from Michael and it was enough to tell him that his friend was angry and could possibly take matters into his own hands without regards for the consequences but…

"Put down your weapon, Meadows and let Garcia go," Michael was saying.

"I don't think so. I'm surprised you didn't see it sooner, Nassar. I saw how you were looking at me. Like you knew something was up. Did spending too much time in Afghanistan dull your senses?"

"Meadows."

Reid held his gun on Meadows as Michael did. It was a standoff and he sensed that it wasn't going to end well no matter what they chose to do. He would be damned if he did what Meadows wanted.

"Join us. Or she dies."

Michael didn't say anything but Reid could tell his friend was curling his lip at the situation. Reid kept his gaze on Meadows who was pointing her weapon at him and he could see her accomplice pointing his gun at Garcia. There were two of them to make the odds better but Reid could see that there was going to be no easy way out of this.

"Mike! Spencer! Just shoot her!"

Reid heard Garcia shout at him and Michael. He looked at Meadows. He was faced with a choice along with Michael and the consequences were going to be deadly one way or another. And the choice was on him.

 _A man does what he must – in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures – and that is the basis of all human morality._ – John F. Kennedy

* * *

 **A/N:** Reid and Mike are in a standoff with Meadows and Garcia's life is on the line. Tag to Believer.


End file.
